5 Ways to Pray for Your Future Husband

You asked me to write a post about how to pray for your future husband. I’m happy to do that, but first, two disclaimers:

  1. Marriage isn’t a guarantee for any of us. God is not our personal genie. That’s why I like to pray these sorts of things for the men who are currently in my life (my dad, brothers, brothers-in-Christ, coworkers, etc.) and then I tack on, “And my future hubby, if such a man exists.”
  2. Just because you’re praying these grand characteristics for your future husband does not mean you’re free to date and marry just anyone, and that they’ll somehow magically materialize into this person after marriage simply because you’ve been praying “spiritual” things. Wrong! Choose a man who—while not perfect—is already obviously headed in this direction.

Okay, with that behind us, here are just five ways to pray for your future husband. (If you’re already married, these are great ways to pray for your husband. And if you’re divorced, by all means, pray these into your ex’s life!)

  1. Pray that he would re-believe the gospel every single time he hears it, rather than believing it once and then leaving it far behind (1 Cor. 15:1–3).
  2. Pray that he would be captivated by God’s beauty so that saying no to lust would be like turning down a McDonald’s hamburger in favor of a grilled, New York strip. Pray that he would be ruthless in fleeing sexual immorality and would fly to Christ instead (Ps. 27:4, 1 Cor. 6:18).
  3. Pray that when he gets angry he wouldn’t sin. Pray that he would be angry over the things God is angry over and not angry over petty irritations (Eph. 4:26).
  4. Pray that God would prepare and empower him to love you as much as he loves himself—to cherish you the way Christ cherishes you (Eph. 5:28–29).
  5. Pray that he would not be lazy or a workaholic, but that he would work wholeheartedly for God in order to provide for his family. Pray that God would keep him from greed. Pray that he would have wisdom to know how to balance work, service, rest, and play (Col. 3:23, 1 Tim. 6:10).

Obviously, there are so many more ways to pray for a future husband. Would you add your prayer(s) in the comment section below?

About Author

Paula Hendricks Marsteller

Paula no longer tries to catch guys' attention by swallowing live goldfish, arm wrestling, and jumping down flights of stairs. Instead, she blogs for teen girls and women by day and journals her adventures by night. Her first book, Confessions of a Boy-Crazy Girl: On Her Journey from Neediness to Freedom, released September 2013, and she lives with her hubby (yes, hubby!) in Syracuse, New York.

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, we’re not trained counselors. If you’re seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as they’ll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate. We may edit or remove your comment if it:

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  • Jj

    I’m going to say this: Paula, I noticed you used the word “choose” . . . when it is not our choice per se. I think for me its about God bringing the right person into my life and me choosing to follow.

    That said, I think those are great points to pray for! Thanks for posting!

    Jj

    • Alyssa

      That’s exactly what it is. When I tried to choose the guy that I thought met my qualifications, I was miserable in that relationship. Then, when I finally let the Lord choose and told him that I’d shred my qualification list but only asked one thing of the Lord – that the guy love the Lord. That’s all I asked for. God gave me so much more. His ways are always best.

      • Paula Hendricks

        I’m so happy for you, Alyssa. It’s amazing how when a guy makes God #1, everything else falls into place.

    • Paula Hendricks

      I get what you’re saying, Jj . . . let me try to explain what I meant:

      We do choose who we’ll date and then marry. Based on how we seek God and wise counsel in making that decision, we either choose wisely or unwisely.

      Hope that helps clear things up!

      • Jj

        I understand that . . . what I kind of meant to say was we don’t need to constantly be searching for a husband. God can handle it. 🙂

        • Paula Hendricks

          Amen!

  • Rose

    I am praying for a man that I can follow. What makes a good leader? A competent and godly leader will have many qualities such as wisdom, patience, humility, strength in adversity, courage, and selflessness. I am praying for a Christian man that I can trust and follow. However, I know I can not choose the “perfect man” (and there is no “perfect man” out there) because God knows what is best for me. He knows what character qualities I need in a life-long partner.

    • Paula Hendricks

      Thanks for sharing, Rose!

  • kwame

    Well, I’m a guy and happen to stumble on this site; good to know that we did not screw up in the first place. I care to thank you all for this platform.

    • Paula Hendricks

      Thanks for stopping by, Kwame.

  • Jesusfreak17

    I am praying for an honest husband and a provider (among other things).
    Also, in your disclaimer, though you are correct, we kinda all are going to get married if we are in Christ because when we go to Heaven, Christ will be our husband and we will be part of the Church, the Bride. 🙂

    • Paula Hendricks

      Amen to that, Jesusfreak17! 🙂 Can’t wait.

  • Brooklyn Mikinzie

    I’m praying for my future husband to be a leader. Im also praying for him to save himself for me. 🙂
    Thank you for this post. Its a great tool! Sometimes Im clueless as to what I should pray about for my future husband. This really helps!

    • Paula Hendricks

      I’m so glad, Brooklyn!

  • Amber

    I pray that my husband will be a Godly and loving man. That he will care for others, and that he will cherish me. That man hasn’t come along yet. Please pray that I don’t get in a hurry and jump at the opportunity to date to a guy that is currently in my life. I like him as a friend and we’ve talked about dating but…it’s just not the right time. When God closes the door, praise him in the hallway! 🙂

    • Paula Hendricks

      Praying for ya now, Amber!

  • P.H.

    I pray that he will have a deep and intimate, personal relationship with God. Like David, God would be so real and alive to him.

    • Paula Hendricks

      Amen, P.H.!

  • Holly

    I pray that he will be a spiritually mature man.
    loving and kind. seeking God’s Kingdom first and foremost

    • Paula Hendricks

      May it be so, Lord.

      And as she waits on You, may Holly run after You and Your kingdom wholeheartedly.

  • Esther

    I’m inspired by all the qualities you mentioned and I think they’re all wonderful. But I also pray for myself because waiting is really hard sometimes and trusting that in time God will bring someone into my life if that is His will is incredibly hard when I don’t see anyone who is right. Thanks for this!

    • Paula Hendricks

      Praying for ya now, Esther. God is good, trustworthy, and more than able at the right time!

  • Harlee Bontrager

    When I pray for my future husband( If there is one waiting for me here on earth:) I pray not only that he’s keep himself pure for me, but that I will remain pure for him as well. Men aren’t the only ones who struggle. A good song about keeping ourselves for our husbands is “Hide Your Love Away” by Anthem Lights.

    • Paula Hendricks

      Just listened. Thanks for sharing, Harlee!

  • Carla Melissa

    How would you encourage a guys to pray for his future wife? I think we woman also struggle with the same/similar things. I like the list but I feel I want to pray those things for my self too.

    • Paula Hendricks

      Dear Carla,

      Go for it! These are great things to pray for guys and girls alike.

      If this blog was for guys, I think I’d add a couple more prayer requests based around girls’ emotions, beauty struggles, etc. Like, “Pray that she operates not out of her feelings but out of truth.”

  • Kathryn

    All 5 things to pray for here are true of my husband of 10 years plus. I had prayed about 4 months into our dating relationship that the Lord would make it clear if we were meant to marry some day. It was amazing given the Lord’s timing, especially since neither of us was “looking”. Both us began to have the same strong sense that we were to marry. We married almost a year later, with the blessing of both of our families and pastor. Since we wanted to be absolutely sure about doing things right, we didn’t rush our engagement period and we went into premarital counseling together.
    Every night I thank the Lord for my loving husband and for His hand in bringing us together. He is a gem. To the unmarrieds, don’t rush things and consider what your pastor and parents have to say. They’ve been around much longer than you, and it would be foolish to ignore their counsel!!

    • Paula Hendricks

      Good word, Kathryn. Thanks so much for sharing your experience. Thanking God with you for bringing you two together!

  • Smartypants

    Thanks for the disclaimer 🙂 Spot on.

    • Paula Hendricks

      You bet!

  • Gayle Meadows Gilyeart

    I was pleasantly surprised that you included praying for an “ex” husband. Thank you for that. I pray for mine.

  • Jennifer Kazmar

    If Marriage is not a guarantee for anyone then why does God give people a desire to be married. If he gives you the desire doesn’t that mean he will give you the desire of your heart when you are delighting in Him First? I’m not sure if I agree with that section. Fruits of the Spirit and learning how to be an intentional spiritual leader are ways I have been praying.

    • Jill

      Too many of us claim that our desires have been given to us by God. We can only be sure that He is giving us the desire to know more of Him and to become more and more intimate with Him. Marriage is a small little picture of what He has in store for you for all eternity. Desire marriage all you want because it is a good thing. Desire Him all you can because He is the best thing. Just be careful that you don’t mix up the two relationships. Don’t assume that because you are wanting something means that is God’s best for you. The children of Israel also wanted something that was neither evil nor unspiritual in and of itself …. They simply wanted their meat more than they wanted God. Be careful. Just because you desire it doesn’t mean that it’s best for you nor does it mean God gave you the desire.
      Enjoy ALL that He has given you today
      and settle for nothing less. I speak from joyful experience as a blessed single.
      Give in to only Him and desire only Him.
      You will be shocked at what you receive
      in life! If He should see an eternal
      purpose that would be accomplished if I
      were to marry on earth I would gladly
      walk the aisle. Until then He is
      accomplishing His great plan in my
      singlehood and I gladly don’t walk the aisle. When I quit associating my desires with His will, life took on a joy unspeakable! Pray that these things will be accomplished in your life for His glory. He only wants to bless you with His very best …. and that’s really Him!

      • Jennifer Kazmar

        Jill,

        Wow, thank you for being honest and speaking the truth in love. I pray God renews my mind. Thank you for the example of the Israelites. Whew, some hard truths here to pray and think about.

      • Maddox

        “Desire marriage all you want, because it’s a good thing.
        Desire God all you can, because He’s the BEST thing.”

        This really spoke to me! Thank you!

    • I so agree! I never get when people say things like this. It’s a little disheartening.

  • Alyssa

    you have encouraged me to wait for the right husband thanks

  • Christa

    This is wonderful thanks! 🙂 I’m going to pray this over for my future husband. God’s confirmed through different things and people that I would marry. I laugh at the idea. I thought I would be single the rest of my life. I’m going to pray that the first guy I date is the man I marry. I don’t want to date just anyone, I want to date the right guy that would then lead to marriage. Is that bad to pray. I don’t want to get attached then break-up. I’ve never dated in my life before. I always said no… I should pray for my future spouse and that God would bring us together at the right time. 🙂 If that’s in my future, which I’m almost positive it is for the confirmations etc I’m getting. I’m also going to use this post as well! I absolutely love it!! 🙂

    • Kate

      I don’t think it would be wise for you to pray for that. God may plan for you to date many men before you find “the one”, and it may be for his glory or your good. It would probably be better to pray for God’s will to be done in that area and for your will to align with His

    • Actually, Kate, what is not wise is to date many men. The Bible doesn’t talk about dating many men until you find “the one”. On the contrary, it does speak about people dating just one person: Isaac and Rebecca, Esther and the King (for her, he was her first “date”), and even though Ruth was a widow, she wasn’t dating many men until finding Boaz, what she did was to be faithful to God and her mother-in-law and the Lord brought to her life, in His time, the right man.
      And outside the Bible there are also lots of examples of people waiting to date the right person, instead of dating several persons just to find out that was not the will of God for them.
      I personally know many persons, men and women, that have waited to date a person until they were sure that that person was the right one.
      Actually, I have two friends that when they first met, each of them knew in that very moment that the other one was the person they were going to marry. Despite that, they didn’t date for the next five years! They just prayed, individually and without the other one being aware of it, all those years. Eventually, when God gave him the assurance that she was, indeed, the woman for him, he asked her for a date, and in that first date…he proposed! He proposed because he knew for sure that she was going to say yes. When he asked her for that first date, she went to that date all dressed up because she was sure he was going to propose that night! This wouldn’t be possible without a faithful wait and without all those years of prayer. They waited on Him, and kept faith that He was going to give them wisdom, and the Lord honoured their faith. Ah, by the way, they have been married for 18 years and are still in love, just as the very first day.

      Christa, if our Lord has given you the message that He wants you to marry someone, there is not a reason for Him not telling you, also, who is going to be that person.
      Pray a lot for the wisdom to know for sure who that person is and wait to date him until you have full assurance that he is “the one”.
      In the meantime, have many friends. That is the advice that an aunt gave me once: “don’t date anyone, just have lots of friends, then, you will know them and eventually, you will, somehow, know who is the right one”.
      As I see it, why to find your partner in the same way non-christians do it (that is, dating many people until you find the right one), when you have a more powerful and effective resource that is prayer and the wisdom that comes from the Holy Spirit?

      “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voicebehind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” ~Isaiah 30:21

      Blessings!

      • Christa

        thank-you for this! I’m going to keep this in mind. I’m also going to be praying for my future husband. I gave that up a while ago and then I felt like God tell me to start praying again. I’m like ok. So, I started to. Kate also has a point too to date around I guess. I just dont want to get emotionally attached to anyone until I know for sure he’s my future husband. I’m also praying that it’d be really clear and I’d just know who he is. I don’t want to be emotionally attached to anyone except my future spouse.

  • emmalee

    I seriously and ABSOLUTELY love this post. currently, i write love letters to GOd, and it reminded me to write letters to future guy:)
    >>these 5 things rlly brought me back to the thought of the RIGHT PERSON MYTH. it is so wrong…meeting up with the right guy doesn’t mean everything will happy happy happy, AND if that OTHER person is thinking the same thing, TROUBLES will come up….
    >>i have to BE the person i want my future guy to become:)
    thank you paula for that PERFECT post and reminder for me!
    HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

  • Moriah

    I love this!!! One thing I pray for regularly(besides these five) is that he would love God more than me. Always. Because God is Love.
    And that he would have a heart for adoptions and missions, because that is what God has been laying on my heart all my life…probably will live overseas when I’m older anyway haha 🙂

  • Isabelle

    Great prayers. I would add that before praying this make sure that you as a woman are first living what you are praying for for that man and most importantly i would add to pray also so that that man can be the complement that you need in order to fulfill God’s purpose for your life. God Bless You

  • Vicki Collado Juares

    Paula are you single? My son is too (:

    • Paula Hendricks

      I’m not, Vicki, but thanks for asking. 🙂

  • destiny

    hi I have read the book

  • Tender

    So relief right now. Thank God for his words.

  • Catherine

    beautiful words:) I like to pray for a man who is after God’s own heart.. a man who will set the example of Christ; loving me as Christ himself loves the church…a man whose standards bring glory to God, whose vision mirrors the will of God. a man filled with and led by the Holy Spirit, someone who i will submit to and work with in ministry, whatever it is that God wills, .. a man with whom I will raise a Godly family.. a man who challenges me, inspires me to be a better person, and a partner who will be
    beside me, encourage me as i grow in the knowledge of the Lord.. Thank you lord for This man, whoever and wherever he is, But most of all father let your will be done, for Your thoughts and ways are way way higher and wiser than mine.

  • Kaitlin

    I been praying for my future husband for a while and this is perfect, just what I need to pray for. I am really looking forward to meet him. Lately, I been having dreams about him, I do not know if God is trying to say something to me about him. I will be praying to have that discover. But everything I dream about my future husband, I fall more in love with him. I been waiting that I get accepted it into my dream program which I did, so now I will be praying for him. I would like that to maybe be the next thing to come (but who knows when that comes).

  • Tahnee March

    It’s true. I googled ‘is it ok to pray for God to give me a husband.’ And the point that stood out most to me from reading a few of the articles linked with this one is that it is right and good to bring our desires before the Lord, but at the same time surrender our will to His. WHOA! In the same prayer – for the same thing! So tonight I started a ’31 day praying for your husband’ guide, and included these 5 points as an added bonus. The way I ended it though, brought my prayer of excitement and anticipation into the stark reality of submission to God, which will hopefully only get easier. It was “And if a husband is not what you have for me, then please let that be ok.” At the moment, it’s not ok. It kills me to see my life as a single forever, but I know that’s not the worst thing that could happen! But if it does, then I need God to make that ok in my heart. I hope this helps you too. At 28, praying for my husband to grow in his love for God and for God to prepare Him for me, and for us to meet is great, but I believe it is equally as wise to pray for YOUR HEART TO BE OK if a husband is not what the Lord has for your life.

  • Madhavi

    One day during my quiet time I was praying and God gave me the verse Psalm 27:14 which says to “wait patiently” on God and to be strong and courageous. The night before someone had asked me why I wasn’t married since I was past 40. I didn’t know what to say because I have tried to meet someone but for some reason it just never happened. Then God gave me that verse. Many of Gods people had to wait on God for things.

  • KYnita

    Thank you Paula

  • Don Vera

    I am here to tell the world of the good works of Great Dr Kumar. My name is Don Vera and this testimony is worth sharing. My man left me and my kids for 14 months to suffer. It was not so easy for me. I contacted so many spell casters who scammed me of my money but nothing happened. I love my husband so much but i did not lose hope and i kept on trying until i met Great Dr Kumar how he has helped so many people. I contacted him and explained to him. He told me not to worry that he will bring back my man in 3 days time. He consulted his powers and required some items from me which he will use to cast the spell to bring back my man. The items cost 200 American Dollars. I could not get it in my country. I sent him the money. He bought the items and cast the spell and to my greatest surprise, my husband came the third day just as Great Dr Kumar said. He begged me for forgiveness and he promised never to leave me for any reason. We are happy and we live together as one. Contact Great Dr Kumar now on: Drkumartemple@yahoo.com and you can also contact him on his website:
    https://drkumartemple.wixsite.com/dr-kumar Thank you sir for your help.

  • Laurry

    obedient submitting heart to God