Creating a Sisterhood of Girls Mentoring Girls

I sat in the conference session with my eyes wide open. It was one of those moments where every word spoken pierced straight into my heart. As the speaker shared about his passion for mentorship and discipleship, I knew my life would never be the same.

After that conference, my life took a drastic turn for the better. I went from having head knowledge about the importance of discipleship to having a heart and passion for it. I was turning into a girl who deeply desired to reach out and minister to the young women in my sphere of influence. It was like I was beginning to see with new eyes.

We don’t need to be perfect to reach out and mentor; we just need to be willing.

Until this turning point, I had never been truly intentional about one-on-one mentorship. The idea had simply never traveled from my brain into my heart and out into action. I knew discipleship was good, but I hadn’t caught the vision for it. In response to that conference, I decided to do something crazy: I asked my two youngest sisters if I could mentor them.

With looks of excitement, they willingly agreed.

That was two years ago. My only regret? I wish I started doing this sooner. I look back and wonder what I was thinking. I had younger sisters right beneath my nose, and the idea to mentor them never occurred to me. Not even once. I just figured, “I’m a good sister and a good example. They’ll figure this life thing out.”

I now realize that mentorship is so much more than being a good sister.

  • It’s about taking the time to personally and intentionally pour into the young women around me.
  • It’s about setting aside time each week to talk about life and the Bible.
  • It’s about intentional accountability.
  • It’s a focused time for me to reach out and pull another Christian girl along in her relationship with God.

Instead of waiting until we think we’ve “arrived,” let’s choose to make an impact for eternity right now.

Watching my sisters grow in their relationship with Christ and mature as young women has been so inspiring. It’s been amazing to watch God use my small efforts to impact my sisters lives so profoundly. I’m not a superhero mentor. I’m sure not a super Christian. I’m not even a qualified counselor or teacher. I’m just a girl who saw the need for mentorship and decided to take action.

I’m confident that each and every one of you could do the same.

Too often we think that discipleship and mentorship is only for “older, more mature women.” That idea simply isn’t true. Older women definitely have tons to offer us, but we as younger women have tons to offer as well.

Instead of waiting until we think we’ve “arrived,” let’s choose to make an impact for eternity right now, right where God has us. Let’s create a sisterhood of girls mentoring girls, a community of young women willingly and intentionally pouring out into the young women around us with enthusiasm.

Imagine the impact that we could have! Imagine if each one of us reached out to one girl and began mentoring her. Then imagine if that girl reached out and began mentoring someone, too. The ripple effect would be immeasurable.

Here are five myths about mentorship it’s time to debunk.

Myth: Perfect mentors are perfect people.
Truth: We often think that we have to be “perfect” to minister. That simply isn’t true. Just think of Jesus’ disciples. They were far from perfect, and Jesus used them in mighty ways. We don’t need to be perfect to reach out and mentor; we just need to be willing. We need to have a desire to honor God and a willingness to pull someone along the journey with us.

Myth: Mentors are always “older women.”
Truth: There’s no age requirement.

I used to think that I couldn’t really be used by God until I was a certain age. I thought the real work was reserved for the oldest and wisest of us all. Then I realized that God can and does use young people to impact His kingdom. My younger sister, Suzanna, started mentoring another girl when she was only twelve years old. She had a little friend that she would “babysit” during a weekly Bible study my mom hosted at our house. Instead of just playing games, my younger sister decided to intentionally talk about Jesus with this little girl. They memorized verses, read through a devotional, and grew in their understanding of who God is. The next time you think you’re too young to have an impact, remember my little sister.

Myth: I need to go to Bible college to mentor.
Truth: You have the resources you need to mentor.

We don’t need to have the highest level of biblical education and knowledge to make an impact. We have the Word of God that is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword. (You can find that promise in Hebrews 4:12). If you don’t know what to do or you feel ill-equipped, just read through a book of the Bible and discuss it as you go. You don’t have to be a Bible superhero to read God’s Word. You just have to open it and start reading.

Myth: I need a five-year plan.
Truth: No elaborate planning is required.

Throughout my years of mentoring, I’ve realized that it can be as formal or as informal as I want. Sometimes I just read a book with a girl. I don’t have a big five-year plan or goal in mind. I’m just reading and studying with her. There are other girls, like my sisters, that I plan to mentor for as long as I can. But even then I don’t have an elaborate long-term plan. I just know that I want to reach out and pour into their lives for as long as time allows.

Myth: I need to wait for a girl to ask me.
Truth: You don’t have to wait for someone to ask.

Don’t wait for the girls to come to you; you take the first step and go to them.

This is by far the biggest thing I’ve learned about mentorship over the years. I used to think that young women would have to approach me and ask me to mentor them. That was a bad plan. Often young girls are too scared and intimidated to ask an older girl to mentor them. Instead of waiting for them to come to me, I go to them. I pray, look around, pray some more, and then go ask. I’m encouraging you to do the same. Don’t wait for the girls to come to you; you take the first step and go to them.

Your Turn!

I would love to hear your thoughts on mentorship.

  • Have you ever been mentored?
  • What kind of impact has mentorship made in your life?
  • What is keeping you from reaching out and mentoring a young woman around you?

PS: For more on the value of mentoring, be sure to check out our Freebie Friday post this week. We’ll be giving away a copy of Adorned: Living Out the Beauty of the Gospel Together by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth. Don’t miss it!

About Author

Bethany Baird

After a brief experience in the modeling industry, Bethany’s eyes were opened to how self-absorbed and lost her generation of young women really are. She and her older sister were inspired to start a blog (www.GirlDefined.com) and wrote a book Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity and Identity. Their passion is to help young women find God’s truth about beauty and womanhood and the freedom that comes from living a radically different life for Christ.

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, we’re not trained counselors. If you’re seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as they’ll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate. We may edit or remove your comment if it:

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  • Tiana

    I would really like to mentor someone. The only thing is, I don’t really know anyone who I could mentor. I’m 13 and I have a 10 year old sister and a 6 year old sister. I guess I could mentor one of them, I just don’t know how. How exactly do you mentor someone? And also, can you mentor someone who is older than you? Any advice from anyone will be greatly appreciated!!

    • Sarah, with Revive Our Hearts

      Tiana…you have a great place to start mentoring…with your 10 year old sister. As Bethany said above, mentoring is “taking the time to personally and intentionally pour into the young women around you”. There would be no one better than to invest in the life of your family and bring your younger sister along in the faith.

      There are a couple of ways to go about this. One would be to invite her to do a short Bible Study with you. Ask your mom or your youth pastor or your Sunday School teacher to help you locate an easy study for the two of you. Then, one day a week, set aside time to talk about the study. Or, you could choose a book of the Bible, like Mark, or James, and read the Bible together. Get a modern translation that will be easy for your sister to understand. You could read a chapter a week together and discuss what you learn from that chapter. The thing to remember is that you are giving truth into her life. That will form a special relationship between you.

      If you have a friend that is new to the faith, even if she is older than you, you can bring her along in the Truth through mentoring/discipling. God bless you and keep you (Num.6:24-26)

      • Tiana

        Hey Sarah thanks for your reply. Do you think that LYWM would be a good book to use? I have the book and the Companion Study Guide.

  • Ruth

    No way Tina I am 13 I have a 10 year old sister and a 5 year old not a 3. With or without my friends knowing it I am going to make a prayer/ bible/gratitude study with my friends thanks for the encouragement👍. Thanks for this post.

  • Emma

    Thank you Bethany for writing this post! It has been very helpful ! There are several girls in my youth group at church that I would LOVE to mentor, especially since I am the oldest girl. Thank you again for the post ! May God bless you greatly as you follow Him !
    – Emma P.

  • Ana

    Such a great topic! I hope you guys post more on mentoring. For me personally, I really wanted to start mentoring for a long time, but it never occurred to me to start with my sister. Thank you for the post 🙂

  • Abby

    This is an awesome post! I am so excited to learn more about this topic, and it is coming at the perfect time. God has been laying these truths on my heart lately, and the advent of this series is providentially timed. Thank you all for the great truth that you post – it is always such an encouragement.

  • Nana

    thank you for sharing this. I’m glad that I stumble in this blog. I’ve been mentoring for 3 years now and I have 12 beautiful ladies with me, I started with 2. I would like to encourage everyone here who’s planning to mentor. It’s not an opportunity to help someone grow in their faith but a great privilege. Just like Bethany said here, that you don’t have to be perfect, there’s no age requirement. All you need to have is faith and passion to lead others. 🙂

  • Ifeoluwa Olubiyi

    whao,this is awesome. This is post is meeting me just at the right time. I used to be actively involved in youth work but with marriage, work, raising a child, studying things have been roller coaster and I have been feeling like I am wasting my life and the many virtues God has deposited in me. I actually started a blog http://www.gracefulcornerpillars.wordpress,com based on my inspiration from so many posts I have read here. I also share some posts from here on the blog as well. I am defintely not yet where I want to be but I am going to take the bold step now. No more waiting for me to be perfect or my life to be perfect. No more waiting for young ladies to come up to me. I created a whatsapp broadcast list for some of my female students from which I communicate with them from time to time especially when I post on my blog. I’d take a step further by asking any one of them if they are interested in me mentoring them.

    Thank you so much for this website and all the posts. It’s impacting many more lives than you can imagine

  • Love this! Looking back I can see how God placed many women in my life to informally mentor me. I’ve had the chance over the past 10 years to mentor and encourage many youth girls as we’ve served as Youth teachers and chaperones. I’m currently asking God who is next.

  • avigail

    What a great idea! I’ll have to give it a try, I have a younger sister which would be fun if we could do something like this! Any tips in how to not make it feel like just another school lesson? I have a couple ideas but would love to hear ya’lls ideas too! https://avigailife.wordpress.com/