When You Want To Be Seen. NOT Serve.

posted by Paula Hendricks on 08/15/12 | Twitter: @PaulaWrites678
Category: Myself; ; 28 comments

I don't know about you, but I want to be seen. Noticed. Celebrated.

That caused a whole lot of angst when I first came to Revive Our Hearts as an eager college graduate. As Nancy Leigh DeMoss' new personal assistant, I fully expected to travel the country with her, meeting and eating with famous people, and eventually following in her footsteps. (I mean, why help adjust someone else's mic when you could wear it yourself?)

My expectations, however, were dead wrong. Instead of traveling with Nancy, I usually stayed put at the office, filling my minutes and hours by buying her groceries, wrapping her gifts (she's an incredibly generous woman!), and taking her suits to the drycleaners. I hated every minute of it.

That's because I was proud, and proud people resist Jesus' low way:

"You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many" (Matt. 20:25–28).

Seven years later, I was given another shot at serving with the right heart attitude. Last month, I accompanied Nancy Leigh DeMoss to Colorado for some interviews at Focus on the Family.

Enterprise guysOur first stop was Enterprise Rent-A-Car, where Nancy and I received more male attention than we have in a long time (okay, possibly ever!). These guys practically stumbled all over themselves wanting us to pick them to serve us. With their exuberant greeting, I asked the Lord to make me as eager to serve Nancy (and others) as these Enterprise guys were to serve us.

And He did. I didn't get to meet and eat with President Jim Daly or VP John Fuller, but I had a great time carrying bags, printing off notes, driving the rental car, and more. And it's not like I was the only one serving. Nancy took the time to really ask how I was on the leg from South Bend to Detroit and to pray for me. She listened and loved and gave to others all week long, even when no one would have expected it of her.

So how about you? Are you striving to be seen or to serve? If the former, what holds you back from serving?

Comments

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, we’re not trained counselors. If you’re seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as they’ll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate.

    Tabby
    Wanting to be seen
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 1:56 am
    I realize now that I want to be seen more than I want to serve. I know it's wrong now. Please be praying for me, and thank you so much for this post!
    girl
    re
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 2:22 am
    great post, but why is it catagorized under 'guys'? It seems more like a "myself" or "sin" post...hmm..I guess there was a reference to a group of many eager men wanting to be serving you...works for me;) Thanks for the post either way, I know I struggle with wanting to be seen and not being heard sometimes. Not usualy in like, helping out jobs because I expect to be doing background work-- I kind of like that better because I'm a bit shy. But the feeling of wishing to be appriciated and noticed for my work is always there. Thanks Paula for your honesty! It's a good reminder to do it all unto the Lord, and serve Him, not to do it for our own regcognition, but His:)
    girl
    re
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 2:24 am
    BTW, is that pic the actaul men who where there to help you?
    Renée
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 5:26 am
    sometimes i am disgusated at myself! everyone thinks i'm a lovely Christian girl who is kind to everyone and never says anything bad about people. and i dont say mean things about people all the time. but i think them! i thnik all the time about how i hate this about so and so or i hate that persons nose and stuff like that. im truely disgusted at myself because of this!
    Christina
    Servants Heart
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 7:25 am
    We need to have a servants heart and if we don't we need to pray that God gives us a servant's heart. Me, i love helping other people! Someone told me one time that they could see that i love serving others. What people tell me to do, i do it and i do it with a smile on my face. I don't have a problem serving others. I love it, that's why i volunteer:)
    Emily Stark
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 8:14 am
    Hi Paula!
    Your honesty and willingness to share your struggles makes you so effective for Christ! I always look forward to reading your articles, because I know they are genuine. This topic makes me think of my hopes and dreams. I would love to become a wife and a mother, but what if God has other plans for me? I need to learn to be content serving wherever He places me, because His plans are always beautiful! Thanks again for allowing God to use you!
    Elaine
    PRIDE
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 8:49 am
    uggg, I've struggled with pride for a long time. I'm a homeschooler and because I've been raised so conservative I haven't done any "big bad sins". So sometimes it's easy to look over my "little sins" and think I'm "better" than others. I've prayed about it and worked on it and God's given me some victory but it's still a problem. This one preacher at a church we used to go to said "God has not saved you out of this filthy sin, he's saved you from it. So you aren't as thankful because you haven't lived in the filth." This was a "family integrated church so all the families homeschooled.
    Chey
    Servants Heart
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 8:52 am
    Our youth group is doing a series on a servants heart and this is a super timely message. I tend to serve with the attitude of being noticed. I don't mind serving because of the so called "Cinderella" stories. I tend to serve because I think the right people will notice. What I completely overlook is the fact that if people notice my service I lose my just reward in heaven because I received it down here. I need to try and hide my humble service at the least. True humility doesn't say poor me or go me; all humility says is you. I need to serve with the intention of pleasing God died instead of others.
    Thanks so much for the post :-)
    Chey
    Typo....
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 8:54 am
    Omit the died in my previous post. Spellcheck!!!!!!! :-/
    Paula Hendricks
    to girl
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 9:20 am
    Yep, that's them! Nancy and I asked them to pose so we could share with our friends their overwhelming welcome. :)
    Paula Hendricks
    to Emily Stark
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 9:22 am
    Thanks so much for your encouragement, Emily!
    Paula Hendricks
    to Elaine
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 9:26 am
    Dear Elaine,

    Thanks for your honesty. I pray that you will see God as He really is, in all His holiness. Then, you will see that all your righteous acts are just filthy deeds. After that, your advocate Jesus and His grace will be all the more amazing to you. He can do this for you. I encourage you to pray this prayer regularly, too.

    Love,

    paula
    Love you,

    paula
    Paula Hendricks
    To Renee
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 9:29 am
    Dear Renee,

    I understand. I have to take similiar thoughts captive to Jesus all day long. Confess them and turn from them.

    I heard someone say this week, "How can the Holy Spirit in me criticize the Holy Spirit in you?" Each person who is filled with Christ can show you something different about His personality. Ask Him to help you see Him in others.

    Praying for you,

    paula
    beth
    seen or serve
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 1:32 pm
    Ouch and amen. My husband and I serve at a small international Christian school in Africa. I struggle daily with this very issue. I know full well that serving means "for His eyes only", but my sin nature always pushes through to seek glory for myself. I detest my sin! Thankfully, the holy spirit convicts me quickly most days, and I preach the Gospel to myself and do battle against my pride and idolatrous heart. It is EVERY (wo) man's battle. Thank you so much for your ministry here. It blesses me and my daughters.
    Brittany
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 1:32 pm
    Nice post, but I don't think I could ever do that for anyone else other than the Lord. Also, the people that i love and care about like my mom. Thanks for the post!
    Elaina
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 1:57 pm
    Thanks for this post! I often find myself wanting to complain about the "hardships" I have to endure and how I am "spiritually" handling them. I hope I will do the right things for the right reasons! Thanks for the reminder!
    kk
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 3:25 pm
    Great post! I do this too, I serve a lot everywhere; and sometimes, honestly, it is really nice to be noticed for what I do. Lately, it's been hard not to be dissatisfied with my family because they don't recognize or appreciate all that I am doing for them. In fact, one brother hurt me very badly, but I responded with forgiveness, and he acts like I "owe" him something and that he deserves to be treated like a king even though he treats me like dirt. Any tips on how to keep serving him even through his unkindness?
    Thanks!
    cece
    Re:
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 5:36 pm
    Great post! I just want to say to the girls, don't beat yourself up girls it takes development and renewing your mind with the word of God to grow in this. God will help you grow! Accept yourself where you're at right now, dont worry you'll get to that level of servanthood instead of wanting to be in seen. Love you guys in Christ!
    Mattea
    I am such a sinner!!!
    on Wednesday, August 15, 2012 at 7:59 pm
    I really need to concentrate on other people and stop thinking of myself with my needs and wants!! Please pray that I'll do so..Thanxs soooooo much LYWB!!! I luv u guys!!
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Tabby and Mattea...
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 10:57 am
    I've prayed for you girls this morning. I pray God will renew your hearts as you have realized your need to serve others and think not only of yourselves. There is joy in serving Jesus, and we most often do that through serving others. May you know that deep joy.
    Elaina
    Re:kk
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 1:21 pm
    Hey kk, I kind of know where you're coming from. I have a dad who doesn't treat me very nicely, but expects what seems like perfection from me. My advice is to try to find the good in him, pray for him and keep on loving him. But this doesn't mean he can just treat you like dirt. We are to be innocent as doves but wise as serpents. Be meek, but don't be his slave either. Sometimes standing up to people and helping them to understand they can't always get their way is the most loving thing you can do for them.
    I will pray for you, my sister! Hope this helps!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    To kk
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 3:44 pm
    Sometimes others truly don’t appreciate what we do for them – other times they don’t even know what all we do for them. Colossians 3:23-25 has helped me tremendously:

    Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.

    God sees everything we do, kk, how we serve, how we are treated. As we seek to serve Him with our whole heart, we can trust that He will justly judge both our service and the response of the one we are serving. When I picture that I am serving God while I do my daily chores around the house, it gives me purpose and joy in the seeming mundane tasks as well as joy in knowing I am serving my Lord. I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me!
    Elaine
    Re Paula
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 3:58 pm
    Thank you so much! This is what I needed to hear
    Rachel Allison
    Ouch!
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 6:10 pm
    This is so hard for me, but God has been working on humbling my heart lately and I'm beginning to see where I really stand in this whole service thing... learning to serve rather than stand in the spotlight is such a difficult lesson, but so rewarding. There are so many things we miss out on when we do not serve... so many opportunities. And sometimes we think, "I could make so much more of a difference if I was in the spotlight," but the truth is we are in a place where we can make a difference when we are serving... I think, even, that the bigger difference is made through service.
    My fear though, is staying humble when you do end up in the spotlight. It's so hard for me sometimes when I am asked to speak or two write... I know that all that I understand and say is only by the grace of God, but it's all too eay to let it get to your head and puff up your pride. And I don't want that! I want to remember, even if I am in the spotlight, to be humble and to serve....
    Jennifer
    Wow!
    on Saturday, August 18, 2012 at 6:47 pm
    This really hits home!
    nana
    help?
    on Tuesday, August 28, 2012 at 4:50 am
    I'm a backup singer in church, and I know for the fact that I sing well (since people around me tells me this quite often). Sometimes when I sing (usually off stage), and I hear my voice is so nice, I like it. Instead of focusing on the Lord, I sort of "adored" my own voice. Can you advice me on this? I watched a video about "wrong worship" yesterday which gave me a slap on the face, thus I know I must change. I admit of having pride, and hard to focus on God whenever I sing, I start comparing my beauty/voice with others. And every time I would try with all might to focus back on Him.
    Ania
    Re:
    on Tuesday, August 28, 2012 at 1:35 pm
    Oh boy, I need for my heart to be changed. Unfortunately I can relate to you Paula! I sometimes more want to be seen and not serve. Thank you for writing about this most important topic!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    To Nana
    on Tuesday, August 28, 2012 at 11:24 pm
    Thank you so much for your transparency, Nana! It isn’t easy to admit to a sin of pride and the sin of comparison. I encourage you to go to God and ask His forgiveness for your heart attitude. Receive His forgiveness and then choose to use your voice in worship for Him and Him alone. That attitude change will not happen overnight, but as you continue to counsel your heart with the truth, you will begin to gain victory here. It helps to realize that your voice is a gift from God. Your voice would be nothing if it weren’t for the beauty that God put in there. When you hear others sing, instead of comparing, choose to thank God for the beauty in their voice.

    There was a period of time in my life when God took my singing voice away. I couldn’t sing at all for several months. He used that time to expose the pride I also held in my heart. He graciously restored my voice and it is such a joy to praise Him with my whole heart and voice again. When I receive compliments, I graciously thank them and then either verbally or just within my heart, I choose to give God the glory and thank Him for the privilege of singing to Him.

    I once had a director who continually reminded us that we have an “audience of One”. And that One is God – He not only hears the music, but also sees the heart. It has helped me to picture singing to God and God alone when I sing. I’ve prayed for you today, Nana, and have asked God to continue to expose the pride in your heart and draw you deeper in love with Him.

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