Does God Still Reveal Whom We Should Marry?

Erin Davis 08/16/12
Category: Guys ; 128 comments

The Lord answered Abraham's prayer for a wife for his son, Isaac with a sign and a drinking jar (Gen. 24). He told Hosea exactly when he should seek a wife and what kind of woman she should be (Hos. 1:2). An angel came to Joseph in a dream and told him to take Mary to be his wife (Matt. 1:20).

Clearly, when God wants to, He is capable of revealing exactly when and whom we should marry. But is that His standard operating procedure? Should single gals (and guys) everywhere be looking for a sign or waiting for God to download the name and location of a future spouse directly into their brains?

bride and groomProbably not. Certainly, God has been direct and specific in this area before and He can do it again. But there is danger in using your heart like a compass, pointing it toward this fella and that fella and hoping that God gives you a signal to start marching down the aisle. It is wise to seek God's input as you look for a spouse, but as you do here are three things to keep in mind.

Feelings aren't facts.
When it comes to love and marriage, feelings aren't the best barometer for God's will. In the biblical accounts where God reveals a specific spouse, there is always something bigger than feelings used as a confirmation. Abraham's servant prayed for a sign and saw it. Hosea heard directly from the Lord. Joseph was visited by an angel in a dream. If you feel like God is directing you toward a specific person to marry, ask for confirmation that goes beyond a "gut feeling."

Stay tethered to the Word.
The Lord gave Hosea some very strange instructions for finding a wife.

When the LORD began to speak through Hosea, the LORD said to him, "Go, marry a promiscuous woman and have children with her, for like an adulterous wife this land is guilty of unfaithfulness to the LORD" (Hos. 1:2).

I tell you that because it's the exception to what I am going to write next. (And it was more about the bigger picture in the nation of Israel than it was about Gomer and Hosea's union.)

If you want to know whom God wants you to marry, study God's Word. There are many places in Scripture where God gives us guidelines for the kind of guy we should "yoke" our lives to. Rather than treating the will of God like a magic eight ball and hoping to hear a "yes," "no," or "reply hazy try again," listen to God's voice by reading what He has already spoken.

Here are several posts from our archives that can help with that process.

I Found Your Perfect Man In Tennessee
Is He the One?
He Must Be a Leader
He Must Pray
He Must Bear Fruit
Will He Be A Good Husband?
What Kind of Guy Should You Date?

Stay surrendered.
If you will marry, when you will marry, and whom you will marry are big questions. The answers are even more significant. Instead of desiring God to make things easy on you and simply give you the name of a future groom and a chapel reservation, it is much wiser to stay surrendered to the Lord in this area.

Seek His will as a single gal. Seek His will as an engaged gal. Seek His will as a married gal. Don't assume that once you become a Mrs. the hard work is done. The goal is not to find a guy and get hitched. The goal is to live surrendered to the will of God and committed to His agenda in all seasons.

Comments

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, weíre not trained counselors. If youíre seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as theyíll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate.

    cece
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 1:16 am
    Yeah I think it's wise that you stay where God has you at each season. So it's good to stay surrendered to him and he will show us.
    Kellie
    Great post.
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 9:49 am
    This post speaks personally to me because of an experience I had a several years ago. I had been praying for a husband since the age of 13, and when I was 19, I pretty much fell head over heels for one of my guy friends, and he seemed to like me back...but only a little. Of course, being a girl, a little is usually just enough to keep you thinking, "Well, what if...?" I had the hardest time with this issue and continually prayed about whether or not this was something I should be pursuing. My feelings became one big veil across my eyes, and I had it set in my mind that no matter what it took and no matter how long I had to wait, this guy was going to be the man I married because it just "felt right." I genuinely thought that what I was feeling was from God, but looking back on it (with the veil off, of course), there never was any true indicator or sign that it would turn out the way I wanted it to. I made every small, insignificant gesture seem important and meaningful when in truth, God's only Word to me had been that He was always there for me and He loved me unconditionally. I realize now that that love and confirmation of His presence was what really got me through the emotional roller coaster of feelings, emotions, true love, and the extremely hard task of figuring out the differences. The Lord was there for me even when this guy wasn't. In the end, it didn't work out with my once-thought future husband. Through the pain that I was going through, I grew much closer to God and started relying on Him more and more about who or if I was to marry. He ended up sending me a wonderful man with a heart of gold, and he literally seemed to come out of nowhere, and I'm so thankful that my feelings hadn't been correct in the first place. God has perfect timing and perfect plans for each and every one of us. Unfortunately, we cannot just snap our fingers and have it happen; we can't decide we're ready and then have it happen. That's up to God. But I do believe that if the desires of your heart are based on getting married, then he will give you those desires...when He sees it to be best for you. He did so for me, and I hope that someone out there can take strength from that!
    cece
    @kellie
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 10:43 am
    What a great story! Yes God does things in his perfect timing! I'm glad you got blessed with a husband in his timing! :) God always ends up surprising us! :)
    Brittany
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 11:30 am
    Great post! I think God should definitely choose who I should marry because he knows who's right for me. I'm leaving it up to him.
    Blue
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 12:14 pm
    But without a clear sign, how can you know you haven't made a wrong choice and married the wrong man? Then you'll never be with the man God wanted you to marry!! This is why I hate making decisions.. I want a big, flashing road sign that says "marry Justin bieber!" (or whoever lol!!) "take this path" "choose this major!" "serve here!" Decisions would be so much easier! if only it worked that way Lol!
    Elaina
    Thanks!
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 12:27 pm
    I love the end where you said the goal is not to get married. The goal is to stay surrendured to God. I hadn't thought of it that way before! Thanks for pointing that out!
    Marie
    RE: Blue
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 12:37 pm
    God does reveal his will to us, just not always in the way we expect. We want clear cut answers for the "big" things. We want God to tell us exactly who to marry, where to go to collage, what to major in, or which car we should buy. We just went through the book of James in a Bible study I'm part of and last week we were in chapter 4 when James tells them they don't have because they don't ask and that when they do ask they don't recieve because they ask wrongly, to spend it on their passions. I think this is often how we aproach desicion making. We pray and ask God to guide us because we don't want to make a mistake, get heartbroken, or have struggles. We asume that if we make the right desicion everything will go smoothly. But that's not how it works. God is just as much about the journey as he is about the outcome. He wants to sanctify us and how can he do that if we never make a wrong choice, never have struggles, and always know what the next step is? What he wants is for us to trust him right now, right where he has us. He wants us to follow him in faith even when we can't see the next step ahead. He does reveal his will to us pretty plainly in his word. 1 Thess. 5:18 tells us "In everything give thanks, for this is the will of the Father in Christ Jesus for you." So we know for certain that it is God's will for us to be thankful, no matter what. Search the scriptures. You will find it is God's will that we be joyfull, paitent, loving, and kind. Yeah, but how does that help us find God's will in the "big" things? How will that help me know who to marry? When you are walking in God's will in the small things the big things will become clear. He who is faithful in little will be faithful with much.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    Blue
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 1:42 pm
    Decisions would be easier if there were flashing signs. I wonder if there were flashing signs in the Garden of Eden when they knew exactly what to do but still chose to do the opposite of what God told them to do. I know that God wants followers who choose to obey Him and trust Him Ė not because they have to, but because of their love for Him.

    I encourage you to surround yourself with godly friends (both your age and older) to seek wisdom from. Often those outside the emotions of a relationship can see things that we cannot see. Seek their advice and listen to them as you consider the decisions you need to make. Listen to your parents. Most of all read the Word, and obey the Word as you listen to God. When you follow Him and walk in His ways, He will give a peace to your soul as you are walk in step with Him. He will confirm in your heart through His indwelling Holy Spirit that you are on the right track.
    Aubry
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 2:30 pm
    And we need to remember that If we will marry isn't necessarily the big question. Whether or not we get married, we can still honor God. Who we will marry is a big question, but not as big as If we will strive to make our marriage last (because even if we start out madly in love, the emotion we call love will always drop out of the equation, the action of love shouldn't).
    rachel
    And who NOT to marry
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 2:40 pm
    Praise Him that he DOES speak on the subject. I was dating a great guy, who my parents loved, my grandparents loved, my friends loved, and who loved me. He proposed, and he said he had prayed about it, and I should be his wife. I said I would pray about it. Well, I wasn't sure. I was under a lot of pressure from family. When I spoke of my uncertainty, he said he had gotten the answer for both of us, and while he would be patient, I didn't need to pray anymore. Well, the bible says who tells you NOT to pray! I had my sign. He was being deceived. It was still really hard to walk away, but I KNOW God answered my maidenly prayer. And I'm so grateful he does.
    Christina
    The Right Spouse
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 4:26 pm
    God does answer our prayers, and no we should not be waiting for the answer. When it's His timing, He will let ya know. I've been praying for a long time, and continue to pray now just my prayer is in more detail because now it seems as though who He has put in my life is the guy He has for me. Thank you for this post:) There's been a lot of stuff lately that's been popping out to me unexpectingly that keep showing me that the guy that's in my life is the guy He has for me:)!
    Ashley
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 7:06 pm
    Okay recently Ive done alot of growing in this area. I believe God has set aside one man for me, thats right I said ONE. I dont think He will hide this man who is to be my future spouse and then say "Okay Ashley, go find him." No I believe that when I truly surrender myself over to the Lord, he will make it clear who it is He wants me to marry. I read this book, before I went to a Christian summer camp that I have attended for six years, it was entitled "When Dreams Come True" by Eric &Leslie Ludy. I truly felt God opening my eyes saying "Ashley, I know who you are to marry let me do the work, let me bring him to you, stop worrying" I may have already met the man God intendes me to marry or maybe I wont for awhile but either way I know that God is beyond faithful and that when that man comes into my life He will give me a sign. Because feelings can lead you astray but God wont
    Bethany
    Questions...
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 8:12 pm
    So, I thought this blog was wonderful and surprisingly (crazy how God works) relevant to life :D BUT. It brought to mind a question. If God doesn't reveal EXACTLY who to marry....do ya'll still believe He sets aside ONE particular man for you?
    Blue
    Re:
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 10:30 pm
    Marie: thank you for your advice! I think that maybe I haven't been faithful with my little bit... You have let God's Spirit convict me. Thank you!! Lol I think that I want to focus on that, and then learn to trust God more with my heart.. You are right . Thank you<33

    Lorree: I would love that peace. I don't think I've been following very well, lately. You and Marie have both let God convict me this way. I just need to follow and trust. I need to be even closer to Him. Thank you for your help =)

    Bethany: I don't believe that there is one man chosen for each of us to marry. Then what about people who married before they believed and later became Christians together? They obviously wouldn't have waited for God's direction in marriage. However, one of the pastors at my church and his wife married before they were Christians and later gave their lives to Christ, and my pastor still says that he is thankful for the wife God has given him. So even though I don't think there's one for each of us, God still decides who you will marry. I don't have this figured out yet, clearly, bc I just posted my own questions, but I do know that my favorite pastor told me one that I should let God choose my husband bc I haven't made many good decisions in my 21 years. Lol!! He's funny..
    Mere N.
    A thought I wanted to share, and a question.
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 10:37 pm
    Hey there, girls. :-)

    I was talking with my youth pastor's wife a few months ago, sort of about this subject.

    And she said Qoute: When you find a guy who loves Jesus more than he'll ever love you, you've found the right guy.

    I just thought that that was cool, and definetly something to look for in a husband.

    Here's my question: Are there any more guys out there who are committed to purity?
    I'm committed to staying pure, down to not having my first kiss until my wedding, but are there any more guys who have that mindset? Or is this just an impossible hope of mine?
    Rachel Allison
    Love it!
    on Thursday, August 16, 2012 at 10:38 pm
    Love, love, love this! Just what I need to read right now.... I think I am going to bookmark these posts and read them every month! haha :)
    Tabby
    I'm not sure yet
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 12:27 am
    I'm too young to think about getting married yet, but there is a guy I really like. I'm wondering if God does want us to get married someday, which is kind of improbable because of some issues. It's sort of a long story, but I really believe God put him in my life for a reason. He's a good Christinan guy, sweet, funny, and makes me feel good about myself. I'm just not sure.
    Bethany
    Re:
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 8:50 am
    Mere: There's definitely still guys out there committed to purity :) they may be few and far between, but they ARE there. I just did a college gap year program, and although not ALL of the guys believed the same thing there were several who very firmly believed in resisting temptation and keeping themselves pure...yes, even down to having their first kiss in the ceremony of their wedding :D Now granted, they might mess up or fall, because it's a fallen world and that's what they do. But there ARE God honoring young men who have their priorities straight out there...you just have to wait on them! :)
    And...i don't know. I tend to believe that God DOES have one guy out there set aside for us to marry. And I haven't figured it out either...because what about people who mess up? Or choose the wrong person? Or get their girlfriends pregnant and then marry them because they feel obligated to?
    But I definitely believe there is a sovereign God who can bring two people together that are almost perfect for each other...if they're both committed to their walk with Him.
    I don't know! :)
    Elaina
    Re: Tabby
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 1:43 pm
    Hey Tabby, I understand what you mean. Even though I used to be too young to think about marriage too, I would wonder if this certain guy I knew was the "one". The bottom line is, when you're both ready, God will make it clear to you both. Until then, focus on your Heavenly Prince! He is the one who will ALWAYS be the love of your life!!
    I hope this helps! I will pray for you, I KNOW how hard this is, I still struggle with it myself (:
    Michelle Tolomeo
    @Kellie
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 2:43 pm
    Thank you so much for your comment. I am currently walking through a very similar situation and God so used your words to speak to me and shed light on my situation. It's so good to know that my situation is not some glitch in my life or specific only to me. Brought me to tears and encouragement. So, Thank you:)
    Kingsdaughter
    I agree
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 6:50 pm
    to much of us girls today are chasing after men in the name of Love or Marriage when the bible clearly a man that findeth a good woman findeth a good thing. not the other way around. So to me we as young woman of God are to sit patiently till God brings that right man to us.
    Russell
    Very good.... He works in the natural and super/natural
    on Friday, August 17, 2012 at 11:59 pm
    Thanks for good information and reference to His word working into our lives at all stages of relationships. Chip Ingram wrote a book " Love, Sex, and Lasting Relationships.
    Christen
    Secret to Sanctification
    on Sunday, August 19, 2012 at 8:00 pm
    I've seen lots of comments on this blog about struggling with fighting sin in your life. Sanctification is the Father's work, and He, and only He, will initiate and perform it. The only thing we have to do is respond to His leading, proddings that His spirit gives us. So, when you're getting so frustrated with yourself for unsuccessfully trying to perfect yourself, just relax. It is only by God's mercy that we ever do anything holy, so just leave the whole work of sanctifying us to him. "Cast your cares on Him"- He understands them better than we do. The battle for holiness can and probably will be painful and hard, but the Invincible King is the one fighting for us, and He will win. "For He who called you is faithful" and He will surely fulfill his work in us and and completely sanctify us.
    Anonoymous 101
    Challenging, how to respond?
    on Monday, August 20, 2012 at 12:31 am
    Thank-you for this! This is actually something that I have been questioning lately. God brought a friend in my life seven months ago, and that opened up doors for me to heal from something that happened to me when I was five.... It hasn't been easy, but I know God is healing me!

    And my question is, that I know it's no accident that I was reunited with my friend after not talking to him for nearly seven years!!! And God always directs me to the story of Ruth.

    However, I don't want to be like maybe, this person or that person is the right one for me! And also, I'd like wisdom, about what and how to pray about my friend.

    God is causing me to pray more and more, and it's hard to keep God in the center of my life.

    I've never really been in a relationship before. But I'm wondering is God behind this friendship?

    What do you think? How should I pray?

    Blessings!!! And thank-you for this!!!:)
    jb
    Re:
    on Monday, August 20, 2012 at 1:50 am
    Oh boy. Has this topic ever been on my mind increasingly lately. About a year ago I felt like God revealed to me who I will marry in the future. At the time, I just had feelings of friendship towards him and loved him like a brother. The thought of something as simple as even holding his hand did not appeal to me. But I was strangely comforted to think of marrying someone as a great companion rather than someone who I lusted over. I pray regularly for God to direct my feelings towards the right guy and the right guy only. As time went on, I began to very slowly develop feelings for him. Right now I care for him so much and I am just waiting and trusting in God for his plan for us. Lately I've been beginning to doubt that God would tell me who my husband will be. Why? Am I making it up? But his scripture seems to confirm why he would tell me his plans (Eph 1:8-10). And at times of doubt I learn things about his character that also seem to confirm it. Through all this, I'm just leaning on God for his guidance and direction and plans. I trust that he has great plans for me and I'm really excited to see them play out. What an awesome God we have. How blessed is God! And what a blessing he is!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    Anonymous 101
    on Monday, August 20, 2012 at 2:06 pm
    I appreciate your desire to pray for this guy friend in your life. Here are a few ideas for you. Pray for him and his future wife. Ask that the Lord keep both of them pure for each other. Pray for the purity of his eyes and his thoughts. Pray he will remain sold out for Christ. Ask God to grow him and to bring opportunities into his life that will encourage him to become a godly leader; pray that he will make God his priority each and every day; pray that he will allow God to bring good out of the trials in his life (Gen. 50:20); pray that he will be on fire for God; pray that he will put the needs of others above his own and serve them as Christ did us (Phil. 2:3-8). You will be making an eternal investment in his life as you do this.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    Bethany
    on Monday, August 20, 2012 at 2:06 pm
    I appreciate your question, Bethany. I believe as we live our lives seeking the Lord, walking in obedience to Him and surrendering our lives and our wills to Him, we can trust that He will bring the man of His choosing into our lives in His time. Our goal is to stay in the Word and apply what we are learning to our lives in becoming a woman after Godís own heart. Being the right kind of woman will draw the right kind of man. We can trust God in this!!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    Mere N.
    on Monday, August 20, 2012 at 3:00 pm
    Your youth pastorís wife is very, very wise woman, Mere N! And I want to assure you that there are still guys out there who hold to Godís high standard of purity. I know many! Never give up hope! And never lower your standards, my friend!
    Anonoymous 101
    Thank-you! To: Lorree!
    on Tuesday, August 21, 2012 at 12:52 pm
    HI Lorree!!!

    Thank-you!! I'm really surprised by your comment in a good way! Because, I felt like God was telling me literally like yesterday that God wanted me to pray for him! Thank-you, I will pray for him for that!! That's certainly a challenging prayer!

    I'm just startled by the idea in a good way!
    I think God is asking m during this hard time for me is to totally focus on HIM, who is the storm-maker! How else should I pray for myself?


    Do you have any thoughts in the way I should pray for the healing process for me? I've been praying for a good Bible study to go too! Thank-you!! I'll again, begin to pray those prayers!

    Blessings!!!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    Anonymous 101
    on Wednesday, August 22, 2012 at 5:58 pm
    You could pray those same prayers for yourself. Is. 61:1-4 as a promise from the Lord that He will heal and restore and bring good out of the tragedies in our lives. You might consider memorizing that, my friend and asking the Lord to do those things in your life as you patiently wait for His healing. Also, Beth Moore has a great Bible study called ďBreaking Free: Making Liberty in Christ a Reality in LifeĒ. You can order this online or get it at a local Bible book store. It is a great study! Iíve prayed for you this afternoon, friend!
    Anonoymous 101
    Thank-you!!! Continuing to Pray!
    on Thursday, August 23, 2012 at 8:20 pm
    Hi Lorree!


    Thank-you so much for the encouragement!!:) I really appreciate it a lot!!:)

    I'll begin to pray those prayers over me. I've been praying a lot lately, and I could use all the prayers I can get! It certainly doesn't happen over-night! I just never really realized how big of an answer of getting past my fear was!

    I haven't looked up Isaiah 6:1 1-4 yet! But I will, tonight! Thank-you again for praying for me!!!


    I'll take all the prayers I can get:)
    joy
    God did it for me.
    on Friday, August 24, 2012 at 12:46 am
    I remember those days when it was as if I will never find a man that will have a fear, hunger and love for God. At a point I almost gave up but as I continued to rely on the promises of God my faith strengthened. And at just at the right time God brought the Perfect Man for me. He is just the exact man I had always wanted to marry. It is still a mystery to me how God connected us together. God is still in the business of giving his children their right partners. Give yourself to prayers, avoid doubt, don't get yourself emotional entangled in a wrong relationship. God never fails
    Billy
    Clarity
    on Friday, August 24, 2012 at 5:09 pm
    My daughter struggled with the concept of god for a long time as a young adult. Luckily, she and my family got help from a place called Clarity Sober Living for Women...check out their site if you ar eloping for help. <a href="http://www.claritysoberliving.com"> Clarity Sober Living for Women </a>
    Billy
    Clarity
    on Friday, August 24, 2012 at 5:10 pm
    http://www.claritysoberliving.com
    Anonoymous 101
    Thank-you Joy!! For the encouragement:)
    on Friday, August 24, 2012 at 9:40 pm
    Hi Joy! Thank-you for the reminder. This area, I've been struggling with, and one guy I talked about has recently came back into my mind after not talking to him for nearly 7 years!!

    And it's hard to just wait so patiently, I know it's no accident, I got reconnected with him. God has given me certain prayers to pray, and I think that's the problem I do. I have more doubt, sometimes then faith.

    I'm just waiting on God on this one!! To have a clear answer. .
    Anonoymous 101
    Ooops!! One last thing!!
    on Friday, August 24, 2012 at 9:47 pm
    Hi Joy

    Oh dear, had some spelling errors!!!
    '
    What I meant, was that I was so surprised, when God brought him in my life after not talking to him for nearly seven years. I'm trying not to put him first, but allow God to heal my heart, and see where God leads!!
    Millie
    Lucky
    on Wednesday, August 29, 2012 at 11:00 pm
    I read somewhere., "Happy is a woman who has a man's last love" If you are one, he is the one!
    bobo
    Re:
    on Friday, October 19, 2012 at 10:40 pm
    Coming from a guy here,

    For the past year I've been engaged to be married. I asked God after I proposed to her if she was the one and she did the same. We fasted and got similar answers that it was a yes. As the year progressed she kept getting more worried about whether or not it was meant to be. Then we started getting signs and dreams a lot more recently of us together in union(still praying and asking God). Then outta nowhere, the people who told us to pray about it come out of the wood works saying that a year ago they had a dream that we weren't supposed to be together and we'd end in divorce...

    I'm really confused...
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ bobo
    on Monday, October 22, 2012 at 2:14 pm
    Although God can speak through dreams, we must remember that our enemy can speak through dreams, as well. But we know that God speaks loudly through His Word. So it is vital that you stay in the Word, reading Scripture each and every day and seeking your answers through Scripture rather than basing your decisions on emotions, or on your dreams and the dreams of others. It isnít uncommon for us to second-guess ourselves once a decision is made Ė especially a major one like marriage.

    Marriage is a huge decision Ė one that is made for the rest of your life. Meeting with a pastor for some Biblical pre-marital counseling is also a good idea as you prepare for a lifetime with each other. Once you are married you must choose to remain faithful to each other and be willing to work through your difficulties rather than settling for divorce. It can be done as you seek to keep Christ at the center of your marriage.

    You said you and your fiancť prayed and fasted and received an answer from God. I encourage you to once again do the same thing. If you have any red flags, it is best to wait until God gives clear direction to proceed. You can trust that He will speak to you through His Word and through the this time set apart for Him as you seek His will for your lives. Iím praying for you and your fiancť right now, Bobo, and asking God to give you the ability to discern His will for you as you make this decision.
    anonymous
    Yikes!
    on Wednesday, October 24, 2012 at 6:45 pm
    I am not a marriage hater, but I am afraid of it because while the Bible and strong Christians make it sound so beautiful, many people, including some Christians make it sound awful. All people talk about are the fights, too much or too little independence, and the dreaded s-word(submission).
    Anonymous
    scared
    on Tuesday, October 30, 2012 at 9:32 pm
    I have been dating a guy for over 2 years. We both I have the same goals and beliefs. We love Jesus and want to serve others and love others all of our days (our professions involve that) and he plans to go to seminary. We have talked about marriage seriously. I know I love him and at times have been very sure I want to marry him. I know we are best friends and have pretty much the same goals and dreams in accordance to living lives that glorify Christ. However, recently I have had major mind battles... regarding the guy I talked to before him. I know it sounds bad.. but its more so about a prophesy. While I was talking to this other guys, who I had met on a mission trip in another country- a woman prophesied to him that he would marry a girl from the U.S. I was the only girl in the U.S. he was talking to and we were both interested in eachother. Talked daily for a year. However, he would not commit by calling me his girlfriend and expressed serious doubt. I broke it off because nothing was coming of it. Later on, I met the guy I am with now. He's amazing... but I have this underlying guilt that maybe I did not obey God's will. It comes to me every now and again and I want more than anything for it to go away.... Am I crazy? I have been so afraid to talk about it out of fear that someone will judge me and not understand that I am truly commited to my boyfriend. I'm just struggling.. in the spiritual relms?
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Anonymous
    on Monday, November 5, 2012 at 11:07 am
    I so appreciate your heart to be in the center of Godís will, friend! Thank you for honoring the Lord in desiring what He wants for your life.

    Isaiah 48:17 says, ďI am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go (Isa. 48:17).Ē

    The Lordís primary ways for revealing His will for our lives is through His Word, prayer, and the counsel of godly people who know us. Talking with your parents, pastor, and other godly friends who know you well and are seeking the Lordís best for your life is vital as you make major decisions such as marriage.

    Based on what youíve shared you were wise to cut-off the relationship with this other individual. Sharing the situation with your parents or a mentor would be wise, friend. God gives grace when we humbly admit the areas of struggle in our lives.

    Donít allow the enemy to steal the joy of what the Lord is doing in your life, friend. You can rest in knowing He will lead and guide you each step of the way.
    anonymous
    such a difficult place
    on Saturday, December 15, 2012 at 11:44 pm
    I recently got engaged this yr and ever since we got engaged we have been fighting up an down. i recently connected with the guy i am talking to last yr...in the beginning we started talking and i really liked him and thought he must be the one...but then as our relationship progressed i just found him boring and we would fight a whole lot..the strange thing though is he would confirm some of the dreams that i had received prior to us reconnecting ...so it was very strange and weird. i never told him about it and he would just say it out of nowhere. well i went from being sure that he was the one to doubting and doubting and doubting..the day of our engagement did it for me...the proposal was ok but he didnt plan anything....an engagement is supposed to be one of the best days of a woman's life but that was not my story....we argued and fought on that day i couldnt believe it.....ever since then we've been arguing and fighting...and i am seriously doubting if this is from God...when i was praying about this i believe i heard God say to me that "the expectations of the righteous will not be cut of" ..ive always wanted a guy is who is on fire for God who is funny, who can be in charge ,,who is a leader..but the guy im with is on the quiet side and at times he can be funny but its not the humor i was looking for...i always wanted to get married in 2013 but now i am telling him that we need to postpone that to 2014 which he is not happy about...i just dont know why God would bring me someone who i am not happy with....its like i am bleeding on the inside from our fights and arguments..i want to give him back the ring and go my own way but i feel like i shouldn't ----i know sometimes we might not get all what we want but why am i feeling this way..why am i not enjoying my engagement...the other day i believe i heard God tell me that i might have had a bad engagement day but would have a great marriage...i am totally confused....i wanna walk away from the whole thing but its like something is holding me back....i feel like i am stuck in a way...Please pray for me that God will show me the way out...my fiance thinks that i dont accept him for who he is because he is quiet but he doesnt understand that it is a struggle for me to accept some things he does which i had never desired i would get in a spouse...i am supposed to be happy during my post engagement and be excited to plan a wedding but i am not. Please pray for me..thanks
    Megan
    Nobody addressed the reverse
    on Sunday, December 16, 2012 at 7:47 pm
    What if all the signs point to the perfect guy who loves God, treats you with respect and no matter where you go and what you do he crosses your path. The signs are very clear. It's him no escaping. But you don't love him. Yet it is God's will you marry this guy. And you are not given any other guy and every situation in your life is designed so clearly so you end up marrying him. And when u pray it's him that comes. U pray harder cuz u don't want him n it's him that comes. N u cry n it's him that comes. Yet u have no passion or desire for him. N all men are either blocked from u or inaccessible. As if the universe is really forcing you to be with this guy. N u r beginning to resent God for forcing u on someone u have no desire for. N not giving u the one u want. He does not do it to the other women. He makes them marry not just the right guy but someone they actually want to have children with. Yet He makes u suffer marrying the one He wants for you that you don't want. I feel singled out even if it's about obeying Gods will. It's like God gives the other girls who they want and right for them n His will. But I have to obey Gods will n sacrifice being human. And for those who will say it is not Gods will, pray about this essay. He will tell you it was His will. He chose me for this sacrifice.
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @anonymous in a difficult place...
    on Monday, December 17, 2012 at 7:41 am
    Be assured that I have prayed for you. You for sure need God's direction and wisdom. That I pray for you.

    I encourage you to find a trusted, godly adult and talk through this engagement. You don't seem ready for marriage. This doesn't seem to be the right young man for you. Don't go ahead with this relationship without wise counsel.

    God bless you as you seek God's wisdom for your life, marriage and future.
    david
    we just have to hand over to God.
    on Saturday, January 5, 2013 at 6:56 pm
    I love dis post,it's insightful,there's actually no majic in detecting God's will and it's not a day work,The relationship one has with God enbles one to hear and comprehend God when he signals to us about hill for one.
    Sujata
    fear and confusion
    on Thursday, January 17, 2013 at 7:12 am
    Hi,
    I'm 35, single and though I belong to a Hindu family, I got touched by the Lord in 2011 and have made Jesus my lord, god and savior.
    What led me to Christ, was a long-distance relationship with a catholic man that did not work out and my aunt guided me to pray to Jesus. This man did show me the way to develop my individuality. What I found in Jesus was immense peace to take me through my heartbreak.

    I surrendered to him completely and he turned things around for me in 2012 when I started growing in faith. I saw a major change in my professional career and as I prayed more in tongues and reciting the scriptures, I grew in faith that much more.

    However, and here lies the confusion, I'm 35 and very soon going to be 36 and I really want to get married. But I have not been able to forget this man completely. I do not talk to him and I have kept no contact with him, but when I pray especially when praying in front of the holy Eucharist, I end up praying for him.

    Though I'm trying to trust God with all my heart, but deep down I still want this man is not just a Christian but gets completely rooted in word of god and comes back. I'm also scared because age is running by and I have no clue on where to search and how to search for the right life partner. I have stayed two years alone and every moment spent in alone has taught me the significance of having a companion by my side.

    Please advise on should I just wait on God and hope that he knows best and will bring the right person into my life. That he will definitely help me get over this person completely and show me a life partner who will be completely rooted in word of God and want me as his wife.

    I'm in Bangalore, India and have quite a limited social circle where people rooted in word of God are concerned and honestly I don't know where to look. I need prayers and advice.
    Ian
    help
    on Monday, January 21, 2013 at 12:22 am
    God had been putting this girl on my heart and mind for months I went to school with her 10 years ago and don't really know her but she was on my Facebook.I contacted her. after a while I start to fall in love with her and still don't know her so this is really weird for me. one night I feel like God is telling m me that I have to tell her that she is perfect for me.I don't do it. I feel really bad. I know I have to do it so I tell her and couple hours later she tells me that demons were manifesting themself too her. then I realize that I wasn't imagining things God had told me why and so I told her why and told her what to pray. but after the whole experience I was really confused to why this happened and I told her I didn't love her and that I think I just had to tell her so the demon would reveal themself so Iwould realize it was God telling me things and not my imagination. when I did this it didn't feel right. then when I woke up in the morning God took me back in time and I saw and heard myself pray four years ago that I wanted to "rescue" the girl of my "dreams" from demons. so I went back and told her this. I remember paying this but really forgot that I had prayed for something so wild. there is more.please respond and I will finish
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Sujata
    on Monday, January 21, 2013 at 5:23 pm
    My heart rejoices to know you have become a follower of Christ, Sujata, and are growing in your faith as you read the Word of God.

    I am sorry for the heartache you have known as a result of this broken relationship. I have several very dear friends your age who also know the reality of longing to be married and yet remaining single. Though the Lord has not yet granted the desire of their heart, they choose daily to surrender this area of longing to the Lord and His timing. Their lives beautifully reflect the grace of God even in the midst of their yet unanswered prayers, Sujata; and God is using them mightily for His Kingdom purposes.

    The Lordís ways often are not our ways, but His ways are always best (Is. 55:8-9), dear friend. The Lord is filled with lovingkindness and compassion toward you. He makes no mistakes, Sujata; He knit you together in your motherís womb (Psalm 139:13-14). He lovingly fashioned every detail of your form and has designed you for a specific plan and purpose in His kingdom (Jeremiah 29:11; Ephesians 2:10).

    I encourage you to listen or read the transcripts of Revive Our Hearts radio broadcasts dealing with the matter of singleness. Youíll find them listed here: http://www.reviveourhearts.com/resource-library/Programs/p/Revive%20Our%20Hearts/topic/Singleness/. Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Carolyn McCulley are both single women and talk about their personal journey here: http://www.reviveourhearts.com/radio/revive-our-hearts/singleness-and-unselfishness/.

    Know I am praying for you today, dear friend. If, after listening to the resources Iíve suggested, you have further questions, please feel free to contact me at info@reviveourhearts.com.

    God bless you, Sujata.
    Ian
    help
    on Wednesday, January 23, 2013 at 9:57 pm
    sorry I know that this is not really my venue but I know God has done this for me and was trying to find any one who has had something similar happen but really just need help and I'm not sure what I need help with maybe I just need to talk to a stranger who is a follower of Christ with a different perspective than mine like I mean a women's view point or something.
    stella karuhanga
    marriage
    on Thursday, January 24, 2013 at 7:14 am
    thanks to all the friends, thanks for loving the lord,and to allow His will to be done ,am also passing through same problem but give it up to the lord ,sometime i feel like giving up,but the spirit of the lord is with me,some time back i hard dreams bout some guy from my church and i was very sure GOD was telling me this man is my husband but at the end of the day the guy wedded some one else,and that day i was also in church u can imagine how had it was for me,but i never gave up in the lord, now started believing GOD for anew life and one year ago GOD spoke to me but some guy,this time with his words Isaiah 55:1-13,judges 13:10, judges 14:3-4,and many more,and this man i have never meet him but i feel i love him so much,now i don't know if its GOD or,some help and prayer, GOD bless.
    stella karuhanga
    help
    on Thursday, January 24, 2013 at 7:33 am
    friends if you have any thing that the lord has done for you please share it with us,it help us to grow more in the lord and to have faith.i promise if i get married to this guy GOD is showing me believe me i will tell the all world a bout the goodness of waiting for the lord.be bless and keep more faith.
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Ian...
    on Thursday, January 24, 2013 at 9:07 am
    You are right; this is not the right venue for you to find help with your situation. You may write for help at info@reviveourhearts.com.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Stella Karuhanga
    on Thursday, January 24, 2013 at 4:27 pm
    Stella, waiting for the Lord to bring a man to you is the way to go. You should not pursue a guy. God designed the guy to be the initiator and pursuer and the girl to be the receiver of his pursuit. Check out these blogs to read more about that:

    Should Girls Pursue Guys?
    http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=522
    Why I wonít pursue a Guy Ė Part 1
    http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=522
    Why I wonít pursue a guy Ė Part 2
    http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=675
    Why I wonít pursue a guy Ė Part 3
    http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=677

    You can trust God with your heart and your dreams and your desires, Stella. He loves you and knows what is best for you. He knows whatís in your future and can be trusted to do whatever is necessary to get you there in a way that brings honor and glory to Him.

    I encourage you to stay in the Wordóreading it and spending time there to know God better. As you focus yourself on growing in your relationship with God, you will find the empty places in your life filled with His presence, His joy and His peace. Iím praying for you right this minute, Stella! God bless you!
    Ian
    thanks
    on Thursday, January 24, 2013 at 9:48 pm
    due to my situation I do believe God still reveals to people who they should marry if we pray for it and it its God s will but at the same time God has given us free will and we all have choices that we have to make. thanks again and I'm happy to see women out there seeking God's will. this is a horrible time we live in filled with deception and sexual immorality so I'm happy to see that there is still hope for my daughter's future. so thank you for shining a light and exposing lies it is much need these days. I pray for supernatural growth of your ministry for I'm disgusted by how many women are treated these days and disgusted at how women have been allowed to believe that this is how they deserve to be treated and that this is how things are. thanks for making a difference
    Danielle
    YES God will choose for you if you let him...
    on Friday, January 25, 2013 at 6:55 pm
    It will never cease to amaze me how Christians can be so uninformed and careless about this particular topic. Have you young guys and gals seriously given this topic any thought? If not, think about it now. God wants to be involved in every aspect of our lives. He wants us to come to a point where we don't do ANYTHING unless we seek his will concerning that thing.
    Okay. As a born-again believer, how many times have you asked God for help in several areas of ur life when it comes to decision-making? Like what college to apply to? And whether or not to take a particular job? Who you marry is the second most important decision you'll ever make (giving your life to Jesus being the first) so, if you can ask advice about college applications, jobs, and places you may want to live, why on earth wouldn't you seek God's face on whom you should marry?
    Really, Abraham's example when it came to his son finding a wife is the best example for us to follow. When you feel like you're ready for a wife/husband, go to God about it. Tell him you're seeking a husband/wife. Ask him to direct you to the right person. Ask him to provide a sign.

    Here's why it's silly to just believe that as long as he/she is saved and so are you, and you're attracted to each other, you should marry; Chocolate milk tastes great on its own. So does lemonade. But if you mix the two together, the taste will be terrible. However, chocolate and peanut butter are an excellent match. A guy/girl may be either lemonade to your chocolate, or peanut butter. He/she may be a believer and a great guy/gal; that does not necessarily mean that he/she will mesh well with you.
    Since God knows you better than you know yourself, he will obviously know which believer of the opposite sex is best suited to you as a life partner. So don't be afraid to ask his advice. God bless.
    lolo
    could it be?
    on Tuesday, February 5, 2013 at 2:56 am
    I have been praying for a particular brother in Christ for about 18 months and he shows no interest what so ever. He is in love with the lord but sometimes i feel like my prayers are just bouncing in the air. I refuse to date anyone else because of how strong my feelings are. His name is also the same name i used to fill out for my street name when receiving money grams a few years back which i thought was strange since his name is uncommon. Also his little 3 year old brother was telling me my last name is poocer which is his last name..am i crazy? Lol
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @lolo...
    on Tuesday, February 5, 2013 at 12:01 pm
    My advice to you...just be friends with this young man who loves the Lord. What a great guy to be friends with! Enjoy his company and don't push for the guy/girl relationship. God obviously doesn't have that for you. (If He does in the future, He will lead this young man to the same interest as you--you can trust Him for that.)

    Keep Erin's statement in the forefront of your mind..."The goal is to live surrendered to the will of God and committed to His agenda in all seasons."
    Kelliebellyfullofjelly
    I think I'm in love with my pastors son?!
    on Tuesday, February 5, 2013 at 4:04 pm
    We're both 17. I am always in a relationship and hate myself for it. So for this entire year, I've vowed to keep it between God and I only. I've grown so close to him throughout high school and with a rough upbringing I have become a very strong Christian. I've started going to a church, and the pastors son is my age. He has taken a liking to me and always sits with me and. Says hello. He's such a wonderful spirit and I love his family. He reflects everything a Christian boy should. He loves God and is the only boy I've ever met with a love for god and faith higher than mine. Most are equal or less. My number one priority for a man is h MUST loveGod, and inspire me. Well, he does. I love his will to see e God and how involved he is at church. He walks me out, pops in when I teach Sunday school to say hi, he also has told me I'm very pretty and said he noticed I have a love for god. He said I seemed very happy and in love with God and then called me "the perfect woman of God." I have this urge to just take it slow with him get to know him and be his friend for a long time, then date him for years before marrying him. I realized this one day when I was working in the church Starbucks. He walked in, and I could smell his cologne. I turned around and he had come in to help. Time froze. All I could think about was how great he looked and how I adored who he was and then I continued to make coffee hoping he'd come say hello, which he did. I feel like that was the moment I fell in love. I mean, I would dream of having a pastor in the family. He could very well become one also but still! And his family would be a great family to have and raise children in, I don't know why I'm so hooked on this, I promise they are all thoughts for the future, but I've never waned to marry someone I barely even know before! I pray every night that God chose this boy for me. And that if not, it will be someone just like him. What do you guys think? Is it just a crush, or have I found Gods (future) match for me?!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ kelliebellyfullofjelly
    on Wednesday, February 6, 2013 at 12:40 pm
    Only God knows the answer to your question, Kellie! If he is ďthe oneĒ, you can trust that God will move it forward. But for now, your thoughts about taking it slow with him, getting to know him and being his friend for a long time is a great place to be. I encourage you to take your thoughts captive in dreaming about the future. When you find your thoughts moving toward and dwelling on the future, try praying for this guy Ė not that he be the one, but that God would continue to grow he passion for serving God; that He would keep God number one in his life; that he would keep himself pure for his future bride (whoever that might be); that he would develop a strong ability to lead others; that he would have a servantís heart. God will lead you to other things to pray as well.

    By doing this you continue to keep your eyes on the Lord and on your relationship with Him as you keep your vow to Him. Growing in your relationship with God is the best way to prepare for whatever He has ahead of you.
    Dan
    Faith without action
    on Thursday, February 7, 2013 at 6:10 pm
    When it comes to serious business like marriage, many times removing the emotion & focusing upon God's rules ( Scriptures ) is the best decision maker.
    Marriage should be treated like a business. Fail to budget, get in deep financial trouble, and bankruptcy can equal divorce, most of the time.

    However, we are not given a spirit of fear but of boldness / courage. We don't need to pray about something that God has put in writing before us. We just need to be 100% obedient and diligent to do it, not 95%, 100%.

    God does NOT call persons to be single. Only two in scripture were ever called and God went directly to them with full explanation. Can someone show me where God called Paul to be single? No, Paul chose that, and he had good reasons. Paul was married at one point else no way he could have been partt of the Sanhedrin.

    I am amazed at how God's design for people, to be a couple, gets perverted because people ( men & women ) fail to take marriage seriously, and then succumb to the notion that it's God Will if they don't find someone, etc.. When we go to God to let our requests be known, we MUST be serious and believe that we receive. We must be obedient to His commands. We should know that God helps those who help themselves - putting action with faith.

    As a man, I am tired of hearing that my desire for a great marriage should be squashed so that in God's timing He may or may not provide a spouse. God is waiting on people, rarely the other way around. If people have partnered with God, they are stepping up in preparing for the blessing of marriage, and God's "timing" is when that preparation ( not perfection ) is sufficient for a spouse akin to what is described in PROV 19:14, to receive PROV 18:22. It equally applies to women.

    Churches today have failed un-married persons - they do not grasp the need to prepare for blessing as a precursor for receiving.
    Pixie
    is it God??
    on Wednesday, February 27, 2013 at 4:58 pm
    my boyfriend and i have been going out for a year now, but he is always givin me problems with other women, im not happy but i really love him. what should i do? we have been in a sexual relationship too.
    nancybas
    I will wait
    on Wednesday, March 13, 2013 at 8:35 pm
    I am working on it...I am praying and fasting for my future partner.God gave me the specific name,,all i need is a confirmation from HIM.Praise God!totally surrendered-that's what i want to read,,meaning our character would be refined upon the Lord..then He will deliver my man at my doorsteps.God bless you more!
    Karen
    Re:
    on Monday, March 18, 2013 at 8:03 am
    So ive recently gotten to know this guy from my church, and we've become really really close, in a friendship way. When i first met him, before we were friends, i kinda liked him, and my dad would make comments like 'i wouldnt mind you going out with someone like him', but it never went further. Anyway, he started going out with my cousin, who im quite close to, but their relationship failed pretty quickly. Thats kinda when we ended up becoming friends. Hes an amazing guy, a super strong Christian with firm beliefs and morals, and has been helping me on my journey with God, he has a heart for missions and so do I. I cant help but think we musnt have gotten to know each other by accident, but i guess myself would be completely content with marrying him, although, he speaks of this girl that he met a couple of times, and dreamt about marrying her, so I dont know whether that could be his sign for his wife, and where i stand in the whole thing... Any thoughts or comments on my situation are welcome, so if you girls have experienced similar, or just want to have your input, i'd really like that!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Karen
    on Monday, March 18, 2013 at 12:59 pm
    Iím confident that if this young man is the one God intends for you, he will make his desires known to you and communicate his interest in deepening your relationship. As you wait this time, I encourage you to take your thoughts and concerns to the Lord. God is the One who has the ďinside scoopĒ on this situation and He can be trusted to lead you through it.

    As you take your cares to the Lord, you are actively working at taking your thoughts captive. Praying for this young man is another great way to take your thoughts captive. Here are some ideas for prayer; ask the Lord to grow him in his spiritual walk; make him a great spiritual leader; give him purity of thoughts and motives; give him a passion for Godís Word; give him a servantís heart; make him sold out to God in all areas of his life. These are great things to pray for yourself, too, Karen. Iím praying for both of you right now and asking God to give you wisdom and direction and be glorified in all aspects of your friendship.
    kathryn
    Re:
    on Sunday, March 31, 2013 at 5:16 pm
    I look at the high divorce rate and am skeptical, extremely skeptical. God knows the future why would he bring 2 people together he knew would divorce . God hates divorce. I can't he doesn't but doubt he's a matchmaker. I'm 37 he's brought no one into my life
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @kathryn...
    on Wednesday, April 3, 2013 at 2:46 pm
    In the case of Hosea, God led him to marry Gomer to give a picture of Himself as the faithful husband to Israel, even when she is not faithful to Him. God does indeed know that two persons will divorce (if such is true) but it isn't His desire. Perhaps it wasn't He that led them together, perhaps one of the partners in the marriage has chosen sin and broken the covenant, perhaps they didn't seek the Lord's will in the relationship, perhaps they didn't have the blessing of their parents, families, spiritual authorities--so many reasons people marry and then divorce. But it is the position of
    this ministry that it is not in His choosing that they divorce. (We understand there are situations where women have no choice ~ in those there is always grace!) You might appreciate this article, What God Hath Joined, at: https://www.reviveourhearts.com/articles/what-god-hath-joined-together-del-fehsenfeld/.

    God bless you, kathryn, as you continue to seek God's grace and direction for your life.
    seeking Gods will
    I can relate
    on Wednesday, April 3, 2013 at 9:09 pm
    I came here today because I'm struggling with a friendship that I feel God has shown me will lead to marriage, but the man isn't interested, its do hard to be friends day after day and want so much more..I'm not sure what I believe, I think where I'm at is, something can be Gods will, but if it isn't Gods time, then it isn't his will..if this is in fact the person for me then God will open his eyes and lead us to that place in his time, if it isn't the person for me then God will.bring me someone else..bottom line is, you don't know what God can tell you until He does , I believe God does direct our steps, of course if we don't stay in Gods plan he will work with that. but he does have a plan for each one of us that is best for us.
    Faith03
    Spiritually Compelled...
    on Tuesday, April 16, 2013 at 4:08 pm
    I came to this blog today because I needed to search for advice from a fellow believer in what I have repeatedly struggled with for so long. For the past 13 years I have been in a similar situation. I was 11 years old when I began attending the church I am now a member of. The denomination is not important because I believe each of us as God's children will rejoice with Him in one accord, whether it be as a Baptist, Pentecostal, Catholic, etc. Anyway, I remember the first day I entered the doors that led to the basement of this amazing union and seen the boy of my dreams standing across the room as what I immediately felt was "the one". I was always one to distance myself from those I cared about most because I came from a broken home with a father who abused drugs and a mother who abandoned me and my older siblings to something she felt was more important; her own life. So I put the thought in the back of my mind and tried to hide it even from myself. I didn't know how old he was, what his name was, or where he came from. I knew nothing about this boy who looked to be way older than me. What I didn't know that day was my life would forever be changed. As a Christian we are raised and brought up to believe that God has "The one" out there for us somewhere. Most of us are so caught up in trying to figure out all the answers and beating ourselves up when we feel we made the wrong decisions, that we forget to remember this life was given as a gift, and our Father never intended for it to be so hard. This is the very thing I forget each time this topic is reintroduced to my life. To make a long story short, this boy turned out to be the same age as me and come from a very good Christian background. I kept this crush I had on him a secret for a couple years, until my sister let it slip one day in junior prayer meeting. My own insecurities led me to approach the situation in a terrible manner, and nothing ever came of it. I tried to hide these feelings i had and deny them to myself while praying to God for them to go away. Once High School began, this boy switched to my school and from there my life became a complete nightmare. He was so mean to me emotionally when we were at school, but when church came around for some reason I looked forward to the time we shared together downstairs as if school never existed. As the years began to slip by our lives began to change drastically. With the end of his high school relationship after graduation we picked up on talking to each other. However, when college came around, we both seemed to go our own separate ways. I met and fell in love with (lets call him Cole) and began to live a life I never wanted. What I grew up loving from God soon became my hatred and blame for the life I was now confronting. I lost myself the year of 2010 to corruption and guilt. Cole and I were slowing making an end to our relationship, and after a terrible situation with the use of drugs, I found out I was pregnant. I was scared, alone, and had nowhere to turn. After a traumatic situation and turn of events in my life I did the one thing I knew best; I ran. I dropped out of school and I moved 2000 miles away in hopes of starting a new life. However, things didn't go as well as I hoped. I miscarried the child Cole and I conceived out of wedlock and went through the hardest thing I believe I will ever endure in my life. I lost myself completely and knew of no way to regain who I used to be. She was gone and there was no possible way for me to get her back. I moved back to my home town neighborhood and ran in to the same boy i knew when I walked in to church for the first time so many years before. He had just ended a long term relationship on a bad note, so we began to hang out and see each other. To this day neither of us know what happened to the others relationship, but we did know we were helping each other learn to breathe again. We kept our arrangement a secret from everyone we knew and eventually our desire for our hearts to heal allowed lust to intervene. What we could have had ended with an occasional glance in each others direction with no words at all. We both went our separate ways again, and within a couple months both of us were seeing other people. I rebelled against God because what was supposed to have felt like a completion turned in to a complete disaster. However, recently I have been struggling whole heartedly with trying to let go of what could have been. By August of last year I felt as though God was letting me know it was time to be single and wait, so I ended the relationship I was in, and in order to take time alone, I moved to New York 1200 miles away. Two weeks ago I went home for a visit and as I entered my home church, there stood the same boy from so long ago with his new girlfriend from when we ended. The feeling of completion when I'm around him came back in and I began to struggle intensely, beating myself up for caring about a taken man. At many points in my life, I made myself remember all the bad things he did for me in order to try to let go and move on. Now that I am back in New York, I wanted to take the time to bask in God's glory and seek what it is He wants me to know about letting go of this desire that keeps reappearing each time I am reunited with this man from my childhood. However, after reading this post, I didn't find the answer I was so desperately looking for. I guess I have known the answer for quite some time now, but my flesh keeps trying to take over and corrupt what was meant to be good. I have been praying that God guide me to my future so I could let go of the past, when in reality I forgot to listen to what He was saying about my present. It doesn't matter who He has in store for you tomorrow. What matters is that the past was given to you in order to make you who you are today. As I look back on all the years I wasted acting as the Israelites and traveling in that dessert bondage for so long, I now realize the promised land was there in front of me all along. I felt bonded by this imprisonment for way too long, I'm not saying I'm meant to be with anybody, because only God knows the outcome of our tomorrow, but I am saying that all those struggles, tears, and little pieces of happiness came about because in the end they make you who you were meant to be. Don't pretend or be compelled to believing you know anything. The enemy will use it against you to hold you in bondage and make you miserable. Acts chapter five in the bible speaks of Annanias and his wife selling their possessions and only giving half of them to the needy in order to look as thought they gave it all. We have to understand that in order to live freely, the outcome needs to be handed over to God completely and not just half heartedly. It has to be a 100% situation before God can do any type of work in our lives. Whatever the urge, give it all away and seek first the kingdom of our Father. Because if you truly give God everything, it will make you free to do anything, and in that freedom, He will give you the desires of your heart as He wills. So for those of you who are dealing with any type of situation in your life where you are worried that you either like him and you shouldn't, or you like him and he doesn't like you, then give it all away. The only time you will ever feel at peace with anything is when you quit allowing the enemy to steal away what God intended to be His perfect will for your lives. Whether it be as single or married, life is meant to be a gift. Cherish it while you are single because you can know that God chose that part of your life especially for you, because you were the only one He entrusted it with. prayers for you all because I know how hard it is to be compelled to something and not know how to listen to that still small voice of God.
    G..A
    yes he does reveal it
    on Monday, April 29, 2013 at 10:21 pm
    The lord does reveal the man/ woman he intends for you to marry he did it to me....this is my story first of all towards the begining of 2012 i finish a relationship with a guy i was dating then 7 months later i started noticing alot of symptoms in my body i was soo scared and depress that he gave me an std the worst of them all hiv. So i kept praying to the lord everynight crying out to Him to forgive me and heal me one early morning at 3am i woke up suddenly saying 'trust me and watch what iam goin to do" i got so surprise but realize it was the lord that spoke through me ok then i started looking for prophets online and found one and she said the lord said he has giving you dreams of someone you know now but i didnt remmember having dreams of nobody soo a couple days later he gave me a dream of a man i started to talk to but i didnt pay much attention to it. But i kept meeting more prophets and all of them gave me confirmation that the lord had someone for me for marriage noww i know who is the man thats goin to be my husband because he reveal him to me and plus gave me signs and confirmation and plus the lord also said that he is restoring my health dont know whats my health problem but he is working in my life i just want to let you guys know that God has a plan for all of you just like he have a plan for my life and he reveals it in many ways keep seeking him with all your heart and you will find him and he will answer like he did for me dont give up..God Bless you all
    Crystal H.
    Re:
    on Wednesday, May 15, 2013 at 10:25 am
    Ive been having dreams about this guy for at least 5 yrs now. Ive consulted God through prayer and he always gives me a dream about this guy appearing in a church setting. Long story short i have talked to this particular guy about it and basically his response is "Never say God told me your my husband because then your lying god wudnt go to the women because she's suppose to be lost." IS THIS TRUE? GOD WONT SHOW THE WOMAN FIRST? IM LOST.
    Anna
    Confused big time!
    on Wednesday, May 15, 2013 at 1:44 pm
    11 months ago I was praying telling God what I want in a husband. I listed all these things. I also mentioned that I didn't want to marry a preacher (not that they're bad, just my preference), have a long distance relationship, that he would be willing to move where I am and that whomever it is that he would contact me in some way. Well, a week later I get a Facebook friend req. from a guy that lives almost 2 hours away from me. He's the same faith that I am and so I just accepted, didn't think anything of it. We started emailing back and forth then talked on the phone for about 2 weeks then met each other. Turns out he is everything I asked for as far as the characteristics and having ALOT in common and looking really good together BUT he is called to preach, he lives almost 2 hours away and at one point he made it clear that moving where I am is NOT an option. But I am completely in love with him. We share so much. I don't understand what is happening. I figured "well maybe God wants me to be a preacher's wife and live 2 hours away" I don't know! I've been confused. He answered like half of my prayer. I've been seeking God asking what I should do.
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Crystal H.
    on Thursday, May 16, 2013 at 2:51 pm
    If your friend means that the Lord has created guys to be the imitator/pursuer in a relationship then heís right, friend. The really cool thing is that you donít have to worry about missing Godís best, because He wants you to have His best more than you want it!

    These past posts will help you, Crystal H.

    ē What Kind of Guy Should You Date? http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=1848
    ē Should Girls pursue guys http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=522
    ē Why I wonít pursue a guy ( Part 1) http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=672
    ē Is He the One? http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=562.

    Praying youíre able to rest knowing Godís love and plans for your life are beyond anything you could ever ask or imagine!

    Eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has planned for those who love Him (1 Corinthians 2:9).
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Anna...
    on Saturday, May 18, 2013 at 7:37 pm
    Making a list is important, but the list is for the purpose of seeking God for His purposes. If there are serious problems with the two areas that won't find fulfillment in this young man, then you need to go before the Lord and list those things in prayer. Ask Him to give His perspective on these areas of the relationship. Be sure the things you look for that are imperatives are things that make a difference for the Kingdom's sake.

    I encourage you to open your heart to God's will and purposes rather than your own desires. Learn of Him through His Word and allow Him to grow your faith in wisdom and understanding. "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom; all those who practice it have a good understanding. His praise endures forever!" (Ps. 111:10)
    Olianne
    Gods Test
    on Monday, May 20, 2013 at 6:23 am
    I have come to this website in hope of finding answers to My questions as to whether I would find a partner.I was involved in a relationship with a non believer for 4years from the age of 18-21.I was deeply inlove with a man whom didn't share my beliefs and during my relationship my belief in God began to wither.He lied ,abused me physically and emotionally and every time I wanted to leave I found myself weak.I refused to listen to the cry of my parents or God.I loved him and that's all that mattered.

    In 2011 he decided to leave me ,I presumed this was the end of the road.I began to consume alcohol in order to ease the pain,Through the grace of God I did not become an addict.I loved him very much so,and every time I find the strength to let him go,he comes back into my life and decides to leave again this happened for almost a year.Until in the beginning of 2013 i decided to trust Jesus my savior.I prayed sincerely for him to remove all obstacles from my life in order for me to find my true potential.I trusted him and the more this happened the harder the obstacles became with my family ,work ,siblings etc.

    I still face these challenges but I am slowly seeing God rewarding me with spiritual upliftment which is far more rewarding than anything in this world.He has managed to shape my character within a matter of months and Ive realised that i need to fall inlove with God first before I can fall inlove with man.I have asked God to help me find a man whom is so inlove with him that I would have to seek God inorder to find him.

    I may have not gotten to my ultimate point of destination and I am still facing trials and tribulations but I have Faith that I serve a living God who knows the plans for my future.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Olianne
    on Monday, May 20, 2013 at 5:32 pm
    Oh, Olianne, how thrilled we are to hear of Godís work in your heart and life. You are absolutely right. As we focus on our walk with the Lord, we can trust Him to bring the right man our way in His timing. We wonder if you might enjoy listening to the series Nancy Leigh DeMoss did on ďHow to Fall and Stay in Love with JesusĒ. You can find the first of the series here:

    http://www.ittybittyurl.com/TP9.

    We have prayed for you today and have asked God to continue to grow you in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
    Phillip
    The Ravages of Unbelief
    on Thursday, June 6, 2013 at 8:43 am
    A few weeks ago I left a post here concerning an event that I had witnessed with my own eyes. My purpose was to see to it that the body of Christ does not suffer the same sins we saw in Israel in the Old Testament. Sins that God hates. I this case that sin is unbelief.

    8 ďDo not harden your hearts as in the rebellion, in the day of testing in the wilderness. 9 ďThere your fathers tested me and tried me, and they saw my works for forty years. 10 ďTherefore, I became provoked at that generation and said, ĎTheir hearts are always wandering and they have not known my ways.í 11 ďAs I swore in my anger, ĎThey will never enter my rest!íĒ 12 See to it, brothers and sisters, that none of you has an evil, unbelieving heart that forsakes the living God.

    They saw the miraculous works of God with their own eyes and they still would not believe. The owner of this blog received the testimony of one of their own brethren for the purpose of the edification of the body of Christ. That is the goal. Unbelief which is sin destroyed that effort. What was lost by the deletion of that post?

    1. Christians would have learned they need not go seeking after a spouse at all. They have merely to ask and God will find them the perfect spouse.

    2. Christians everywhere would have seen the goodness of God and thereby give him the praise and glory he rightfully deserves.

    3. It would have eliminated unbelief everywhere which God hates. The faith of many would have been built up.

    But a single instance of unbelief destroyed all of that. How many can say that God personally married them? I havenít seen that since Adam and Eve. One might argue that maybe it also happened to Joseph and Mary but we donít know for sure. But how many would like to say that? They would have had a point of reference to go to by that post so that they recognize what God is up to and not mess up the whole thing.
    This couple was successful. They were only successful because God worked with both the man and woman closely speaking to them daily. The man knew what was going on having spent so much time in the bible. That was not the case with the woman however and she almost blew the whole thing. God had to speak to her directly several times.

    What the owner of this blog should have done is simply ask for more details and those details would have been given to them. Instead, they denied the entire body of Christ the edification that is so valuable to it in a single act of unbelief.
    Paul
    why can't God bless me to find love?
    on Thursday, June 6, 2013 at 10:27 pm
    i will never understand why would God bless so many very lucky men and women that were very fortunate to have met one another and have a family, but not others like us. sometimes i really think that he is punishing us from having a normal life that we would have certainly wanted as well. why would i not want to share my life with a woman? i hate being alone and single as it is, but there are many people that like being alone which i will never understand. i did not do anything wrong for this to happen to me, and with so many very mean and nasty women that will curse at us men for trying to start a conversation with them, i can certainly see why it is very hard for many of us looking to find a good woman now.
    Phillip
    RE @Paul
    on Friday, June 7, 2013 at 3:38 pm
    @Paul, I don't see a reply link so i'll do it this way. I know exactly what you are talking about and how you feel. God has not forgotten you even though you'd swear he has. There are many others just like you and God promises to take care of each one. You might wait 6-10 years while God is preparing you and her. Be assured he already knows who she is. She's already been picked out and set aside just for you. Won't nobody else be claiming her. The waiting is just God preparing each of you.

    When you are introduced you both will know immediately. Though she being the female might be hesitant and a bit less believing than you. Be assured that she will know even if she at first is hesitant to admit it. Your job will be to comfort her and reassure her and God will give you specific instructions to that effect.

    Don't quit unless God specifically tells you to quit when you find out who it is. That comforting of her will be excruciatingly painful. It requires that you die to yourself. Husband are to love their wives to the degree that they would not hesitate to give their lives for her just as Christ gave his life for us. So that is gonna hurt a bit upon your meeting her. She needs to be assured though even though God has already spoken to her and told her that you are the one.

    Keep an open mind because it could literally be anyone. Study your bible incessantly because you might have to help her to grow in grace. You're going to have to know the word of God for that.

    She will look precisely as you want her to look and have the exact demeanor as well. She'll be perfect for you. It astonishes me how God knows exactly what we like, but it really shouldn't. He is God. She is going to take your breath away.
    Sharon Robert
    Waiting on God
    on Sunday, June 9, 2013 at 2:16 am
    Hi everyone,
    My name is Sharon Robert. I am from Malaysia.
    I am a single girl(39yrs old), i am still waiting on the Lord to provide me my Rib Cage(Boaz).While waiting, i surrendered my desires to the Lord..Am i lonely yes, do i feel sad sometimes oh sure, who doesn't...But what is Faith? If you can see n then you believe...that is not Faith...Faith pleases God...Tell Him your desire and wait for Him..When you do your part, He will do His...He will come quickly,,,
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Paul
    on Monday, June 10, 2013 at 5:50 pm
    Phillip has spoken some very wise words, Paul. I hope you read them and think on them. I encourage you to stay in the Word and focus on your relationship with the Lord as you wait His timing for marriage. By doing this, you will be actively participating with the Lord as He prepares you to be a spiritual leader and godly man. ďHe who has begun a good work in you will carry it on to completion at the day of Christ JesusĒ (Phil. 1:6).

    I also encourage you to look for ways to serve in your church. By focusing on others and serving them rather than focusing on what you donít have, you will be pleasing the Lord in your service. Iím praying for you this afternoon, Paul, and asking God to help you to find security in His eternal covenant love for you as you wait His timing and His plan to be revealed for your life. ďMay the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.Ē (Rom. 15:13)
    S.Grace
    Waiting Waiting Waiting
    on Friday, June 28, 2013 at 6:36 am
    Im Grace, 36 years old, Im saved baptised and waiting for God's Will in my life. I was also taken back by one of my christian married colleague who loved me very much and at one time i had to fall also but God released me 2 years back from being very close with him. Im working for a different office now. but i still however cant forget him and here lies the confusion, I'm 36 and I really want to get married. I dont to talk to him and I dont want to contact with him. He calls me and talks with me. Even after several problems with his wife he still talks with me. If I say Yes he is in the idea of marrying me and to accept me a s his second wife but I told him very specifically that im not a girl to spoil some other girl's life ( i meant his wife). Honestly i speak before God, If God doesnt want me in this situation He could provide a permanent way for me to get our of this and get me into a new married life. Just because Im alone i need his friendship if not im sure im not a girl of such kind. And when I pray especially when praying I end up praying for him.

    Though I'm trying to trust God with all my heart, and I'm also scared because age is running by and I have no clue on where to search and how to search for the right life partner. I have stayed two years alone and every moment spent in alone has taught me the significance of having a companion by my side.

    Please advise on should I just wait on God and hope that He knows best and He will never do mistakes and will bring the right person into my life. That he will definitely help me get over this person completely and show me a life partner who will Love God more and be completely rooted in word of God and want me as his wife. Please pray please. let God forgive all my past sins and renew my life. Amen .

    I'm in Bangalore, India and have quite a limited social circle where people rooted in word of God are concerned and honestly I don't know where to look. I need prayers and advice.
    S.Grace
    Waiting Waiting Waiting
    on Friday, June 28, 2013 at 6:39 am
    m Grace, 36 years old, Im saved baptised and waiting for God's Will in my life. I was also taken back by one of my christian married colleague who loved me very much and at one time i had to fall also but God released me 2 years back from being very close with him. Im working for a different office now. but i still however cant forget him and here lies the confusion, I'm 36 and I really want to get married. I dont to talk to him and I dont want to contact with him. He calls me and talks with me. Even after several problems with his wife he still talks with me. If I say Yes he is in the idea of marrying me and to accept me a s his second wife but I told him very specifically that im not a girl to spoil some other girl's life ( i meant his wife). Honestly i speak before God, If God doesnt want me in this situation He could provide a permanent way for me to get our of this and get me into a new married life. Just because Im alone i need his friendship if not im sure im not a girl of such kind. And when I pray especially when praying I end up praying for him.

    Though I'm trying to trust God with all my heart, and I'm also scared because age is running by and I have no clue on where to search and how to search for the right life partner. I have stayed two years alone and every moment spent in alone has taught me the significance of having a companion by my side.

    Please advise on should I just wait on God and hope that He knows best and He will never do mistakes and will bring the right person into my life. That he will definitely help me get over this person completely and show me a life partner who will Love God more and be completely rooted in word of God and want me as his wife. Please pray please. let God forgive all my past sins and renew my life. Amen .
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ S. Grace
    on Monday, July 1, 2013 at 3:49 pm
    As you confess your sins, God will forgive your sins and cleanse you from all unrighteousness (1 Jn. 1:9). His forgiveness is always available to you, my friend. Once you have received His forgiveness, you need to turn away from your sin. This means that you need to break off all association with this married man, S. Grace. It is wrong for you to be in a relationship with a man who is married to someone else. Do everything you can to break this off. Donít meet with him any more. Change your phone number and donít give it out to him. It is not Godís will for you to be involved with him. God will never lead you into sin.

    When you find yourself thinking and praying for this man, I encourage you to turn your prayers towards asking God to strengthen his marriage, grow his love for his wife and turn his eyes back to his wife so that he is honoring his marriage vows before the Lord. Pray for his wife that she would encourage him and give him the love and attention he desires.

    I donít know if God has another man for you, S. Grace. But I do know that this man is not in His will for your life. I realize it is difficult to wait, but God does know what is best for you, He never makes mistakes and He can be trusted to lead you in the way you should go. I encourage you to take this time in your life to spend time in Godís Word, prayer and memorizing Scripture. If you have an older friend who is a godly woman, it would be wise for you to share your struggles with her. She can pray for you, encourage you, keep you pointed in the right direction and hold you accountable by asking the hard questions.

    Iím praying for you, S. Grace, and asking God to give you strength, wisdom and courage to trust Him, turn away from sin, and embrace His plan for your life. Stay in the Word, my friend. It will keep you anchored to the heart of God.
    paul
    Re:
    on Saturday, July 6, 2013 at 8:29 pm
    Where in the bible does it say God will find us a mate? He only did it twice to my recollection. and if God truly finds us our spouses, why is the divorce rate so high, even amongst Christians? The Christian divorce rate is higher than that of atheists. And if it's such a great thing to wait, then why don't all Christians just stay single then....just saying....
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Paul...
    on Monday, July 8, 2013 at 4:21 pm
    The Bible doesn't say God will find you a mate. That understanding is communicated in the sentence above: "If you will marry, when you will marry, and whom you will marry are big questions."

    It is indeed a sad statistic that the divorce rate is so high among Christians. We must keep our eyes on trusting the Lord for every situation/relationship in life and look to Him for His strength and help. Marriage is a good thing and so is singleness (See 1 Cor. 7). The goal is to be surrendered to Him and content in every circumstance (Phil. 4:11). God bless you.
    Rachel Beth
    Content with Life
    on Thursday, July 11, 2013 at 8:00 am
    I do remember being a young girl praying for one day my husband will come along. I've come close... But no.
    I'm now in my early thirties and just beginning to embrace life without thinking "I'm going to be disappointed"
    Cause let's face it... Life happens!
    I'm so thankful that I prayed that God would answer my prayer about who I shouldn't marry... During the moment of breakup was not fun... But God answers if you ask him to intervene.
    At the beginning of this year I heard God say to me "am I willing"
    Willing to do what? Willing to just be happy in life, living life enjoying people, growing!

    The hardest thing for me has been letting go of the man I loved... He did not love me... I couldn't understand why cause I'm like...awesome! Lol

    But the exciting thing now is what is ahead...look up to God, fix your eyes on his love, pray without ceasing for your future husband or wife... But pray for opportunity to meet. If there not in your life now...the timing is not right. Keep smiling, stay hopeful and full of faith. Don't loose your faith in God over disappointment. Don't give up! Love who you are :)
    Yolanda
    Complete trust in God
    on Monday, July 22, 2013 at 12:59 pm
    For the past five years I dedicated to serving in my local ministry. During those five years I remained single and prayed that God would bring me the right man in His time. Late last year (2012) I met this young man who was still in the world. He enjoyed my company because as according to him " I didn't talk like his other friends, and the things I said always made sense" I shared with him about the love of Christ and He changed. he surrendered his life to Jesus. It was evident as he quit smoking, drinking, secular music and just was on fire for God. He changed the friends he hung out with and started attending my church. We ended up being attracted to each other and he said that I was everything he ever wanted in a woman. I was not too sure whether He was the one for me. I decided to pray and fast for 3 weeks about it. During the time I received two bible verses (Ezekiel 37:15-23 & 1 Corinthians 7:1-7) I took this as confirmation that he would be the one I would marry so we started dating. I would say that during the relationship we got too caught up and ended up putting each other in front of god. Upon realisation, we decided to always pray and share about our quiet times every time we meet. It was working. We did have bitter arguments but we always reconciled. Just a few weeks ago, he met another young woman at work who was still in the world. She confided in him as she was having relationship problems. I told him to be careful as she might fall for him. She did fall for him and wants to marry him. the sad thing is that he started liking her too. When he told me I was shattered. He also started mentioning all my weaknesses and comparing me to her. He broke it off with me. I immediately turned to god and repented and allowed god to heal me ( a tough process). We still keep in contact. He says he still loves me but cares about her and doesn't want to hurt her. His relationship with God is shaky as well. He has also considered dating her. His emotions are all over the place and seems to want the best of both worlds. I got sick of waiting for him to make up his mind. Now I am totally healed! Just the other day we talked over the phone, he told me that God knows how he feels...implying that he still loved me and wanted to marry me.He seems to be playing with my emotions. I didn't let that sit in my head or heart.I have fully surrendered to God and just want God to being me the right man in His time. right now i am focusing on God and waiting upon Him. I still wonder whether I heard wrong. Did I?
    I know now to completely trust God, pursue God and not other men. Whether I end up with Him...I don't know. One thing I do know, God knows the type of man I desire to marry and He will Bless me with the right person in His time. # healed # trustingGod
    Last Edit: on Monday, July 22, 2013 at 1:06pm by cgaul  
    eve
    Thanks
    on Wednesday, July 31, 2013 at 11:11 am
    Thank you very much god richly bless you
    sandeep vanamali
    marriage
    on Thursday, August 1, 2013 at 12:29 pm
    from past 6months, iam in love a girl who already married, from since a week she is avoiding me, but i love her so much i want to know that whether i will get married with her are not
    Kaligirl
    Is he or isn't he the one for me
    on Tuesday, August 6, 2013 at 12:12 pm
    Wow, I have been those women who sees a guy christian or not that gave me attention and always wondered is he the husband for me.. Needless to say I made two choices and they both ended up in divorce. I have been single again for three years and I struggle with being alone. I have no children and currently not dating because my heart again has been captured by someone who I think could he love me, could I love him knowing some good and bad things about him.. I try to tell(really convince) myself that he isnt the one for me and I am tripping again. But those desires are still there and I seem to can't give them up. I do believe that God has my best interest it is just that I felled again for him ( he is a christian,), but is that enough???? Can and will he Love me as Christ loves the church??? I want to believe this but someone how I don't.. I am not sure what to do. I am being so transparent and I really need God to come thru for me. Please keep me in prayer...
    William O'neal
    Re:
    on Tuesday, August 6, 2013 at 9:41 pm
    I'm really sorry to say this but I'm 32 and I just don't understand why God won't give me a wife until I commit myself fully to Him. I'm not a outgoing guy who jumps up and down for Jesus and if I were saved I'd be very private about it. But with the end near, I just do not want to die a virgin. And I may just have sex and hope my consequences are a unwanted pregnancy or disease. I'm 32, not 21, with a emotional disability. I just do not have time to wait. Is it a sin to marry the wrong one?
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @sandeep...
    on Wednesday, August 7, 2013 at 7:38 pm
    You already have your answer. If she is married, she is not the girl for you to marry. (Matt. 5:32)
    salms
    Was It God Speaking???
    on Saturday, August 10, 2013 at 8:06 am
    Am from Nigeria, and am 35. In january this year I was introduced to a girl for marriage by one of my aunts. The girl leaves in a different state where I leave so we communicate through phone and facebook. We liked each other and have equally developed love and affection for each other and have agreed to get married. I have a lot of things in common and can confide in each other about anything no matter how secretive or personal it is. We pray and make plans for the future concerning our marriage. And when I look to the future I am happy with the knowledge that she will be my wife. I have prayed and asked God if she is the 'one'. The first time I heard while praying was "continue to love her", the second time I heard "is it about Rosemary? Don't worry". Rosemary is the girl in question. My family has come to love and accept her, but her parents do not like me. The mother told me categorically that am a nobody and how can a nobody marry her only daughter, that what will people say about my marrying her daughter. Because of how she (the mother) feels about me, she sent the daughter to a prophet to seek the future and to know whether am her daughter's rightful husband. The prophet told them that I was not the right man with predictions of awful things that would happen if the girl marries me which scared the girl a lot. I rejected and cancelled any bad prophecy against me or the woman I will marry through the name of Jesus. They told the girl to ask me to go, hence God has spoken which she did. But I asked her to join me in prayer and fasting so that we seek God's will together and not base our conclusion on what the prophet has said because I don't believe it came from a true man of God. I am of the understanding that if its God that spoke to that prophet that He will reveal same message to us. We also prayed that if we are not meant to be together as man and wife, let God put hatred in our hearts for each other.

    We are yet to hear from God, Instead, the love between us grew stronger. Rosemary has asked that we do not rush the matter, but give it a little time, and pray that God will touch her parents hearts about us which I agree totally. But my fear is this:
    1. Am I wasting time with her
    2. The words of that prophet, could it have come from God?
    3.What about the things I heard while praying, was it God really speaking to me?

    Pls pray for me and advice me on this matter as I continue to have faith in God for His direction.

    I wait your comments and those from other believers on this forum.
    Shalom.
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @William Oíneal
    on Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 10:05 am
    You are right in your understanding that time is short, Mr. Oíneal. The urgency of the hour is that you embrace the Creator of the gift of physical intimacy. The gift alone (created specifically for a man and woman who have entered the covenant of marriage) can never bring the fulfillment and pleasure your soul desires.

    Would you take a few minutes to consider the truths found in this post,
    https://www.reviveourhearts.com/articles/the-greatest-gift/ and short video clip
    https://www.reviveourhearts.com/gospel-story/?

    Praying your heart finds rest this day in Jesus.
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Kaligirl
    on Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 11:23 am
    Jesus longs to heal the hurt and wounds of your heart, friend. He grieves at the suffering you have known in your life.

    My prayer for you today is that you will grow in your understanding of Jesus love for you this year, Kaligirl. That the Lord will provide you with a godly, older woman who can help you grow in your walk with the Lord and in understanding the decisions and though patterns that led to broken relationships in the past.

    I have an article Iíd like to send to your email called, I Should Not Have to Live With UnFullfilled Longings. Leave me a comment if youíd like to receive this, friend.

    Praying this passage for you this morning. May the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the steadfastness of Christ ( 2 Thess. 3:5).
    Belle
    confused
    on Tuesday, August 13, 2013 at 10:16 pm
    there was this guy, i'll call him Ryan, that came into my life about a year ago (i was 13). I felt attracted to him, he was funny, cute, and on-fire for the LORD. one day, God told me specifically that He will reveal secrets to me. I smiled, and said "whatever You want God, I'm willing." so, then, that night, I was attending a prayer meeting along with some friends, and Ryan. we were praying for a family, and Ryan started quoting some scripture. about half-way into the chapter, i heard, clearly, "He's the One". I stopped praying, opened my eyes, and stared at Ryan, who was just sitting across from me. Feeling a little freaked out, I prayed on this for about a month. Everytime I asked God, I heard a "Yes, this is the truth". But I've read in song of songs 2:7, to not arouse love, and let it come when it desires. And I've asked God to clearly tell me if what I heard was my own mind, or satan's lies, or something (one of my struggles is that I often hear my own voice instead of Gods, sigh)... so now I'm confused. Did I hear God, or myself? Do I listen to what the scriptures are telling me, or what my heart feels like God is telling me? Also, I felt like God was telling me to tell no one else. Is that significant?
    salms
    Re:Was It God Speaking??
    on Wednesday, August 14, 2013 at 3:59 am
    Hello again everyone, I posted a comment here few days ago with the above subject matter and none of your administrators has responded. Pls do find time to respond to my comment through here or my email.
    God bless you.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Belle
    on Thursday, August 15, 2013 at 1:04 pm
    I cannot be the one to tell you whether you heard from God or not, Belle. One thing I do know, though, is that when the time comes for you to be in a relationship, you can trust God to bring the man to you and he will pursue you. You are still young and that man may be Ryan or it could be someone else.
    While you are waiting, I encourage you to pray for Ryan as a brother in Christ. Ask the Lord to give Him a passion for Scripture, grow him in His love for the Lord, give him opportunities to cultivate a servantís heart, give him a desire to remain pure in his heart, mind and body for God and his future wife. Praying these and releasing Ryan and your desires to the Lord will free you to focus on your own walk with the Lord. Keep Him the center of your focus now and in the future, as well. God loves you and has amazing plans for your life. He will guide and direct you as He walks with you each step of the way (Is. 43:1-3).
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @ salms
    on Thursday, August 15, 2013 at 4:16 pm
    You are wise to continue to seek the Lord regarding this matter. Proverbs 21:1 assures you that the Lord is able to change the heart of Rosemaryís parents if this is his desire. tw

    Iíve included two links that will provide further biblical insights in discerning the will of God.

    ē How to Figure Out Godís Will http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=792.
    ē Find Your Future Mate http://www.familylife.com/audio/series/recommended-series/finding-your-future-mate

    I pray you and Rosemary will honor the Lord in all your ways.
    Terrie
    Just ONE guy? try THREE...
    on Monday, August 19, 2013 at 6:32 pm
    I do not believe God necessarily has only one man in mind for you to marry, and no one else. Free choice changes people and things. If you are a Godly woman, and a loving person, you may be able to make a great marriage with any one of a number of Godly men; or, in my case, THREE. Yes, THREE. My first husband died when I was 27. I remarried when I was 30, and I clearly understood that the Lord was leading me to this man. He died when I was 40! Shortly after that I received an even stronger witness that I was to marry a new friend; I questioned it, fearful because it was so soon, but it would not go away and, in fact, grew stronger. We married quickly and the reasons kept popping up for years. Sometimes you don't get the answers as to "why" until you take that leap of faith first! Besides which, as it turns out, we had one more child who needed to join our family, and there was no time to waste at 40! Don't assume there's only one man for you: what if he makes choices to become something other than "right" for you before you meet? God knows and will take care of you. Surrender your will and keep yourself prepared for the kind of man He has for you. It may not be just ONE!
    Cindy
    Confused in Clt
    on Friday, August 23, 2013 at 4:51 pm
    I am a woman struggling to find out if the guy I've been seeing for the past year and a half is the right one. At first he told me that he could see himself marrying me but now he says it's up to God. He has some issues in his past with hurt from other relationships but he says he is over them now. I'm really not sure if that is true. I have been praying to seek God's will and to see if this guy is my husband but after not getting a confirmation I've been praying that God reveal my husband to me. (Not just him whom ever he is). Now I'm feeling that I could be waisting my time if the guy i've been seeing doesn't know yet if I'm his wife. What should I do in this situation? Please Pray for me.
    Becky
    Lost
    on Saturday, August 24, 2013 at 7:09 am
    I started searching on the internet for answers as I feel completely lost at the moment.

    I have been with my partner for 8 years - we live together and got engaged last year. My problem is ever since I have got engaged I have had doubts about whether he is the right person for me.

    The doubts started when I went out to do some charity work in Uganda earlier this year. It is true to say that over my teenage years I lost my faith with God, but being in Uganda with lots of Godly people but God back into my mind. I started praying to him over these doubts that I had and things seamed to ease and get better.

    However recently the same doubts have re surfaced and I am not sure whether it is God telling me he is not the right person for me? My problem is that he is an amazing man and I love him very much but he is not a Christian. He has said that he is willing to do an Alpha course with me but I feel like I should be with someone who is a very strong Christian and I am just not sure if he is the right person for that?

    I have felt very low recently due to these doubts as I have been told by friends that this should be the happiest time of my lift and it's just not. The problem is he was bought into my lift by prayer 8 years ago - I was going through a very rebellious (and sinful) time 8 years ago... my Mum prayed that I would meet someone that would calm me down and this is when I met my partner.

    I have been praying continuously and reading the bible (even though I don't really know what I am doing) and I am so frustrated as I feel like God maybe doesn't listen to me like he does for others as I never get signs like other people.

    I want to do what God wants me to do but how can I do that if I don't know? On top of that it scares me if I did break up with my partner as what if I realise in a years time that he is the man God wants me to be with but it is too late? It would also break his heart and I really don't know if I could do that.

    I don't have any Christian friends I can speak to this about - please help!!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Becky
    on Monday, August 26, 2013 at 1:25 pm
    Iím sorry you are experiencing doubts about your relationship, Becky, but Iím also very thankful that you are renewing your relationship with God through this. He is the only One who can satisfy your deepest heart needs.

    God is very clear about many things, including living together before marriage and joining an unbeliever. He loves us and wants to protect us from the pain that can come from both of these situations. Sex is to be saved for marriage and living together creates an atmosphere where that plan fails. (1 Cor. 6:18-20; Heb. 13:4; 1 Cor. 7:2). God also tells us to not be yoked together with unbelievers (2 Cor. 6:14-18). I encourage you to confess your sin to the Lord, Becky, and receive His unconditional, faithful forgiveness (1 Jn. 1:9).

    Then make the changes you need to in your life in repentance. Find another place to live. Take a step back from your engagement. Go ahead and take the Alpha course with this guy and see what God does. Pray for him and ask the Lord to draw him into a personal relationship with Him that is vibrant and growing. No one is beyond the saving grace of Jesus Christ (2 Pet. 3:9). When this guy surrenders his life to Christ, he will begin to grow by leaps and bounds and has the potential to be a mighty spiritual leader.

    I also encourage you to find an older, godly, wise woman to share your struggle with. Find someone who loves Godís Word and strives to walk in obedience to it in all areas of her life. She wonít be perfect, but she can keep you pointed to the giver of grace (2 Cor. 12: 9-10). She can pray for you, encourage you and support you in the days, weeks, months ahead. If you donít know of anyone, check with your pastor as he may be able to suggest someone.

    I encourage you to slow down, back away and allow God to have His way in this relationship, Becky. Iíve paused and prayed for you today asking God to give you a teachable heart, courage to do the hard thing, words to share with your guy, grace to walk a difficult road ahead and patience in trusting Him to walk before you as you choose humility and obedience to Godís Word.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Cindy
    on Monday, August 26, 2013 at 1:37 pm
    If you are having any doubts at all, Cindy, it is best to slow down and wait Godís timing in your relationship. Jeremiah Canfield did a great blog for us on what to look for in a guy. Check it out here: http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=1848. I encourage you to pray for this guy you are with and ask God to give him clarity and direction in his life. I also encourage you to be patient with him as marriage is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility for a guy to undertake. Iím praying for your wisdom, and for much grace in your life for the days ahead.
    Favour
    Marriage
    on Monday, September 9, 2013 at 12:03 pm
    Marriage is indeed a mystery, who can understand
    gary
    Re:
    on Tuesday, September 24, 2013 at 1:55 pm
    Stop listening to inner voices! Read your Bible for guidance.



    My experience with Baptist/evangelical theology can best be described as a wild Roller Coaster ride: a lot of great psychological, emotional, and spiritual highs and a lot of deep psychological, emotional, and spiritual lows. Why?

    In Baptist/evangelical theology, your Justification and your Sanctification---your essence as a follower of Christ...if you boil it all down...is really dependent on you and your feelings. Your salvation is dependent on you performing an action; a deed; a good deed: making a mature, informed, decision; the correct decisionÖ for Christ. And your assurance of salvation is based on you maintaining a sufficient level of "feeling Christís presence within you" to confirm that your previous ďdecision for ChristĒ was done correctly and sincerely. Why else would so many Baptists and evangelicals report having multiple ďborn againĒ experiences?

    Do I feel saved? Do I feel I really repented in my born again experience? Do I feel that I truly had faith when I made a decision for Christ; when I prayed a version of the Sinner's Prayer? If I am really saved, why do I feel at times that my faith is so weak? Maybe I need to do the born again experience again; maybe I need to pray the Sinner's Prayer again, just to be 100% sure that I am saved. I want to know without any doubt that I am saved, and if I do not feel saved, I begin to doubt my salvation.

    Baptist/evangelical theology tells me that I will always feel Christ's presence and strength inside me...if I am a true believer. But what if I don't feel him there sometimes? If it is true that I should always be able to hear God speak to me, in an inner voice or feel his inner presence move me/lead me to do his will, what is going on when I don't hear anything or feel anything? Have I committed some unknown sin and he is refusing to hear me? Or is the reason that I don't hear or feel him present within me... is because I'm not really saved!

    I was so incredibly happy to find orthodox (confessional) Lutheranism and find out that my feelings have nothing to do with my Justification, my salvation, or with my Sanctification, my walk with my Savior and Lord! My salvation was accomplished 100% by God. He placed the free gift of salvation in my "lap" before I even considered asking for it. He wrapped me in the "blanket" of salvation without my assistance. I am God's by his choice, not mine!

    http://www.lutherwasnotbornagain.com/2013/09/is-jesus-your-friend-or-your-king.html
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Gary...
    on Wednesday, September 25, 2013 at 1:43 pm
    I've found Baptists to be people of the Book. I'm sorry you were led by some to think it is about feelings. You are right; it is not about feelings, but simply about faith. "For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is Godís giftónot from works, so that no one can boast." (Eph. 2:8-9) An indescribable gift! God bless you!
    Becky
    could this be a confirmation?
    on Tuesday, October 1, 2013 at 7:37 pm
    i am christian from a christian family too. i relocated to another state and saw a brother in my church. the first time he came to greet me and had an handshake, i felt real good and really liked him. few weeks later, he got a job in my office and that made us to be real close friends. there was a day we were discussing and he told me the month and year he would like to do his wedding but fortunately, it was the same month and date i had in mind. recently i have been reaming about us getting married. he told me he has been dreaming about me too getting married to him. could it be a confirmation?
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Becky
    on Wednesday, October 2, 2013 at 3:24 pm
    I donít know if it is a confirmation or not, Becky. But I do know that as you focus on your personal relationship with Jesus, praying, reading Scripture and serving others as He leads, you will be ready for anyone He brings into your life. I encourage you to pray for this young man as you would any other brother in Christ and surrender your love life to the Lord. Iím praying for you today.
    Seriously Speaking
    Re:
    on Wednesday, October 16, 2013 at 10:06 am
    when we look at so many other men and women that were Very Blessed By God that have met and found Love And Happiness Together, it hurts us Very Much knowing that we would had certainly wanted the same thing as well, instead of being alone and having no one. It is much Worse for us when the Holidays come around, and we're still alone which is Very Sad for us. I have read one of the other Articles that was said by God that said, No Man Should Ever Be Alone. I will certainly agree on that.
    Kee23
    Tired/hopeful of waiting
    on Sunday, November 17, 2013 at 7:33 pm
    I found this blog today after being very discouraged because my mom told me to move on from the guy that I think is the love of my life and I love it. I've been in an in and out relationship for the past 8 years. It started in high school and now we are in our twenties. It has been such a struggle he has put me through hell because of his resistance to commitment. I believe this is an iniquity of his because he does not know his father and his family isn't very loyal or successful in marriage. I love him with all my heart and we get along great. Still there is issues and a long distance factor do to school and careers. Even with that I feel we are connected. I have tried to move on but then circumstances always bring us back together. Everything goes great and then he flips and becomes very distant. He loves The Lord and is great but then can be so cold hearted. I know it's because of pain that he harbors. How much pain should I go through for him? How do you know when to move on and how do you actually do it? I pray for him, for the right man to come, and for me to have the strength to close and open the right doors. Yet I'm still in the same situation. I'm sad to say that I am fearful that I've wasted time and then I'm fearful to leave that it will be worth the wait if I stay. I need Jesus lol I need help because it's to the point that no one wants me to stick around for such uncertainty. No ones perfect and I have faith that he will be a better man I'm just scared this is my will. I try to focus on God at all times but sometimes it's hard because I want a companion. Also it's hard to date as a young urban black woman and keep my purity. men don't seem to want to start a connection without sexual intimacy and I just can't go there. He is my first and only. Advice?
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Seriously Speaking
    on Tuesday, November 19, 2013 at 9:59 am
    We have removed your comment due to the nature and purpose of this blog for young women.
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @Kee23
    on Thursday, November 21, 2013 at 1:16 pm
    Youíre asking great questions, Kee23. Our post How Can I Know If a Person Loves Me (http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=856) will be helpful to you.

    Seek the counsel of your parents and other godly adults who know you well. Be honest with them about your fears and concerns. Ask the Lord to help you gain perspective through their insights.

    Years of misery, heartache and non-commitment donít describe the heart of one seeking to love you as Christ loves the church. Donít settle for anything less than Godís best for you, friend.

    Surrender anew to Godís ways and His timing, Kee23. Commit to walk in His ways.

    ďFor My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,Ē declares the LORD. ďFor as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts ( Is. 55:8-9).Ē
    Nicole
    Online dating
    on Friday, November 22, 2013 at 9:16 am
    I am really struggling about these online dating sites.I am 38 years old never been married.i have no children.I was wrestling with the question of am I wrong to be on a christian dating site.This morning I began to pray and ask God is it his will for me to get married,this is how I came to this site.I ask how do you really no when God is directing you to the right person to marry.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Nicole
    on Monday, November 25, 2013 at 4:37 pm
    I appreciate your struggle, Nicole. Waiting Godís timing regarding our singleness can be very difficult. It is important for us to remember that God created man to be the pursuer and woman to be the responder. Itís also important to be cultivating your relationship with the Lord as you wait. The closer you are to God, the better able we are to discern His will in any matter.

    I want to suggest you go to ReviveOurHearts.com and check out these broadcasts:

    A Biblical View of Friendship and Dating
    http://tinyurl.com/kn9w54n

    Lies Women Believe about Unfulfilled Longings
    http://tinyurl.com/mqsv9df

    Seven Secrets for Singles
    http://tinyurl.com/pc8ygoa

    Along with the links in the above blog, you might also find some guidance on our TrueWoman.com blog. Here are some other posts and prgrams on finding and discerning Godís will: https://www.reviveourhearts.com/resource-library/topics/gods-will/

    Iím praying for you, Nicole. God loves you and has your best interest at the center of His Will for you. Stay in the Word. It will keep you anchored to Godís heart.
    Bee
    Still Single
    on Friday, February 28, 2014 at 7:49 am
    Hi, I am 30, and still single. I think I was round about 18 when I first prayed for my life partner.. God spoke to me via night dreams, I asked for confirmation on this, and I got the confirmation. I am not attracted to the person in anyway but I saw the potential in him. 12 years later I have met someone else but he being my life partner is still in the back of my head, he was also engage to be married but is with someone else. Did i understand God incorrectly? I don't feel confuse, I just want to sort this out. Get it behind me... And please do not stop praying for me.
    Sarah, with the LYWB team
    @Bee...
    on Saturday, March 1, 2014 at 6:15 pm
    Thank you for posting and giving us the opportunity to pray for you. I have prayed for you this afternoon--asking God to give you wisdom and guidance in the matter of marriage and waiting for the right person. ďThe Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped;therefore my heart exults, and with my song I shall thank Him.Ē (Ps. 28:7)

    If God did confirm the young man 12 years ago, then there was purpose in it. We can't read God's work in your heart or thinking, or know His purpose behind what happened 12 years ago; but consider it may have been to keep you single until you met the one you were to marry. It is quite alright, and good, for you to see the young man that you have met and are interested in. Make sure he has a strong relationship with Christ and will be a godly leader in your relationship. Pray through this relationship and see if God leads. Ask godly people in your life if he seems to match what they know of you. Prayerfully consider the relationship and enjoy the journey of seeking God's direction. Don't let the past 12 years ago determine this relationship. God will lead you now as He did then. Open your heart to hear His leading. "I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go" (Isa. 48:17). God bless you.
    Nchindo
    c
    on Tuesday, March 18, 2014 at 3:07 pm
    well i appreciate all you ideas, but i want to say there is now formula in which God works. rather he works differently with individuals so hold onto what you believe in cos me, i must see the depth of what i believe in
    Sinnie
    Shallow Christians
    on Monday, March 24, 2014 at 12:43 pm
    Hello -

    I am currently 34 years old. I attend a 1400 member church in SF - and 75 % of the church are single . Of these people - I see the same 10-15 girls getting asked out again and again. I am not one of them .

    I have little faith in men - most of them are shallow idiots ( some of them went to seminary school). All they look for is a pretty face and a nice figure - someone who knows when to shut up and not have a strong opinion about anything; and I resent God for making me a woman. I don't think God cares about me ... I have been praying for spouse for over 8 years and year after year I have nothing but disappointments.

    Ironically non Christians would ask me out on dates ... Just last week, no one of the opposite sex at church would look or talk to me. I find most Christians at my current church fake, pretentious, and shallow. My pastors are equally shallow , their wives are like models. And I don't know why or how this loving God would love me this way .

    If I don't look at certain way - I am not attractive therefore I don't deserve to be loved.

    I hate my church .

    SC
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ SC
    on Tuesday, March 25, 2014 at 6:02 pm
    We are sorry you are struggling so in your church finding the love and acceptance you deeply desire. We want to assure you that God does not base His love for us on our outward appearances but on our hearts (1 Sam. 16:7). He does love you, SC. He created you in His image and sees all that is going on with the details of your life (Ps. 139).

    We hate to see what is happening in your current church cloud your view of all believers. Would you consider looking at visiting a strong Bible teaching church in your area? You might also consider a smaller church where people can get involved in each otherís lives and serve Christ together.

    We have paused and prayed for you this afternoon, SC. As we were praying God brought this series from Revive Our Hearts to our minds. Would you be willing to take the time to listen through and hear the heart of another single woman who has walked in your shoes?

    Practical Counsel on Singleness with Carolyn McCulley
    http://tinyurl.com/kctu8cd
    sandrine
    Re:
    on Sunday, April 6, 2014 at 4:05 am
    Hi.I m 20 n I think of this certain guy all d tyms.he is an actor n from d 1st tym I ever watched his movie(4 years ago),I v always had it on my mind.I always tell my friends n they say I am obsessed.but I always dream of him.I came to have his number throuugh my elder cousin who resides in his country n they r friends.so we began to communicate,though not often.some of my friends still say I m obsessed but others think things could grow.I v prayed to God several tyms dat if he s not d 1 for me,let me stop thinking of him.but as days go by ,I think more of him and he is just my dream guy physically n my cousin tells me he is a very simple n prayerful guy...pls wt shld I do???
    Carrie, with the LYWB team
    @sandrine
    on Monday, April 7, 2014 at 2:55 pm
    Glad youíre here on the LYWB Blog, Sandrine.

    Check out these past posts to help you evaluate the young man youíve mentioned:
    ē What Kind of Guy Should You Date? (http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=1848)
    ē How Can I Know if a Person Loves Me? ( http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=856)

    Then consider evaluate your thoughts of this young man based upon the truths in these posts:

    ē http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=720 Ė How to Spot an Idol
    ē http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=862 Ė The Story of a Girl and Her Idol
    ē http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=860 Ė Your Godís Donít Love You \
    ē http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=863 Ė Steps Toward Removing an Idol

    Grace and peace,
    Carrie
    joy
    help
    on Wednesday, April 16, 2014 at 2:12 am
    Hi, am 23,and I have been dating dis christian guy for over three years now,we were serious and had marriage in mind for the future.but recently my pastor said he had a dream were "M" introduced him to a girl he wanted to get married to and it wasn't me.I was not happy about it.And my pastor asked if I wanted to continue with the relationship or quit...we have been praying..please I need your sugestion.
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Joy
    on Wednesday, April 16, 2014 at 4:43 pm
    I encourage you to continue to pray about your relationship. Have your boyfriend pray, as well, and get the input and advice of your parents and other godly people who know you both well. Trust that the Lord will lead you through these important people. Spend much time in the Word seeking Godís counsel and wisdom. He promises that if we ask Him for wisdom, He will give it generously (Js. 1:5). I know this is hard for you, but Iím comforted knowing that God is right there with you and will lead you in the way you should go. Iím praying for you right now.
    joy
    thanks
    on Thursday, April 17, 2014 at 7:19 pm
    Thank,am greatful Godbless u.
    Ms. Love
    false dreams
    on Thursday, April 24, 2014 at 1:09 am
    Hi, please call me Ms. Love. I'm in my mid 40's and have been single for 8years. I was ready for a wonderful man of God to come into my life until I had many false dreams and false hope of meeting my husband. When I was a teenager I prayed for a husband told God exactly what my heart desired. A TALL, good looking, man etc. Praying for a mate I was very clear with God what I desired in a mate. So two years ago I start having these dreams about a tall goodlooking man at this time I was totally convinced that God had reveal to me whom was my husband. Being a baby in Christ again after giving my life back to Jesus you know going to church trying do the things of God. I meet whom I thought was friend and a woman of God. Sharing my dreams telling her everything only to find out she wasn't a friend there was huge red flags that was reveal to me through prayer about this woman, but I wanted a friend to tell my dreams to encoring the Holy spirit. Through a source I found out this man I was dreaming about got married so I question the Lord how could I have so many dreams and to know so much about this man through my dreams. My so call then friend when she heard that the guy got married she laugh, said a lot of hateful things to me after that I went into a deep depression telling myself no one wants me, not good enough for nobody, but I had to move on with my life. Its hard now for me to believe in my dream. Ladies beware of false dreams guard your hearts and please don't tell your dreams to know one because it is really some haters out there hoping you will fail. My question is how will I know for sure God is speaking to me because I don't now believe in my dreams. I know the word says he that finds a wife finds a good thing. I just don't know what to believe anymore, ladies be careful there is a such thing of false deceitful dreams I'm testimony to that. God Bless!
    Lorree, with the LYWB team
    @ Ms. Love
    on Thursday, April 24, 2014 at 3:35 pm
    Thank you for sharing your testimony, Ms. Love. Iím so sorry for the pain you have gone through and may still be going through. We know from Scripture that our enemy seeks to kill, steal and destroy (Jn.10:10) and he can do so even through our dreams. God will never speak to us contrary to His Word. So when you are wondering if you are hearing from God, I encourage you to take your question to Scripture and see if you find something to confirm what you are hearing. In regards to tall, dark and handsome, God tells us that He looks at the heart rather than outward appearances (1 Sam. 16:7). He tells us that we are not to marry an unbeliever (2 Cor. 6:14). He gives us character qualities that we should look for as a godly leader of our home (Titus 1:6-9). Jeremiah Canfield tells us other things from Scripture we should be looking for in a man we may date or marry.

    Check this out: http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=1848.

    Iíve paused and prayed for your healing, wisdom and discernment as you move forward.

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