One Reader's Take on Real Beauty

posted by Erin Davis on 06/16/11 | Twitter: @ErinGraffiti
Category: Myself; ; 48 comments

Our readers love to talk about God's truth. Several months ago, we offered the chance for LYWB.com readers to submit posts for our blog. The response was overwhelming. You'll be able to catch the writing of these one-time guest bloggers in the coming months. These are readers just like you who are striving to live out God's truth. Since these are guest bloggers, their style or approach may be a little different than you're used to, but we've read every word and we think they've got something important to say. In fact, check this great post by Rachel Chick.

It started weeks ago when I happened to see a makeup commercial for CoverGirl announcing their new product called "Simply Ageless." Ellen DeGeneres played the usual, unrealistic-looking "model" to show off the product. It wasn't the actual commercial that bothered me, but what she said in the very beginning: "Inner beauty is important, but outward beauty is even MORE important." In all honesty, I was somewhat angry. Being "beautiful" isn't everything. The sad part is many girls will believe that. To argue that external beauty is most important completely contradicts the Bible, as 1 Samuel 16:7 says:

"The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

More recently, I went to the beach for a week. During that time and the week after I got back, five different people mentioned to me that I didn't seem THAT tan. (If you're one of those people, and you're reading this, I have nothing against you; I am just adding this to my point). I'm not one to care a significant amount about my own outward beauty, but this did bother me. Did you know that being tan was once not even valued?

Four hundred years ago, alabaster skin was considered an essential item for the fashionable woman (Graffiti: Learning to See the Art in Ourselves, p. 18). Tan skin was a stigma associated with the lower classes, who mainly worked outdoors. Beauty trends are constantly changing. What does it matter if I'm not tan enough today, for tomorrow pale skin could be back in style? This is the same with any trend, whether clothing or objects.

Part of being beautiful is just being satisfied with the way God made you and not constantly trying to be "good enough" for the world and its corrupt and unrealistic views. The truth is, you will NEVER be good enough to the world or to people of the world. It often saddens my heart when I read through different comments from girls on this blog. So many of you, including those who are Christians, struggle with being pretty or skinny enough. Even godly girls can be insecure about the way they look. However, being beautiful means nothing when a girl's heart is a dark shade of black and full of hate and bitterness (Matt. 23:28). (On a side note, check out this post from the LYWB archives about having a "pretty heart.")

In the midst of all the shallowness and fake views of the world, we can find truth from God's Word about the way He loves us and what REAL beauty is:

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised" (Prov. 31:30).

"The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor him for he is your lord" (Ps. 45:11).

"I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God" (1 Tim. 2:9–10).

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well" (Ps. 139:14).

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart" (Jer. 1:5).

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight" (1 Pet. 3:3–4).

I think a girl can be most beautiful when she's in love with Christ her Lord and desires to be more Christ-like each day, containing the most valuable fruits of the Spirit: "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" (Gal. 5:22–23). And if you read that verse carefully, you'll see no mention of outward beauty.

About the author: My name is Rachel Chick, I'm from the great state of Pennsylvania! The Lord has stolen my heart and my greatest desire is for His will to be done and for Him to use me in ALL the ways He can. I enjoy grape popsicles, astronomy, McDonald's caramel frappes, and getting my paycheck from Panera Bread!

Comments

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, we’re not trained counselors. If you’re seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as they’ll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate.

Carina

Beauty
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 3:13 am

Thank you so much for this post! I struggle with this alot, especially comparing myself to other girls to see if they're "prettier". But I find my worth in Christ, who took me and made me beautiful. I have nothing to brag of except my Savior. I'm beautiful because I've been redeemed! :)

Thanks again!

Love To All My Sisters In Christ,
Carina

The world
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 8:09 am

No offense to any bikini wearing girls.I have found that buying a one piece bathing suit is next to impossible. The world thinks that bikinis are the must have. When I think that modesty is way more attractive.

Kenzie

Thoughts.
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 9:03 am

This is an awesome post, Rachel!
I have soooo many friends that struggle with outward beauty, even though they are very pretty both inside and out! Lately I have really been trying to encourage and uplift them in the Lord and show them that it's the heart that God looks at, just as 1 Samuel says. Please pray for me as I try to reach out to the hurting girls around me, and that I won't fall into the trap while trying! (:

Gods Jewel

Great Post
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 9:11 am

I know that I struggle sometimes with thinking that I'm not pretty enough. I've gotten better! I have a lot of friends that don't know christ and i hope one day they will see Christ through me..keep praying..

P.S. I love Panera Bread!

Makenzie

Loved this post!
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 9:41 am

Wow Rachel you did a fantastic job! Recently I have been reading the book Girl Perfect by Jennifer Strickland, and I have been thinking and going back to some of the older blogs on the site that talk about what true beauty is. This was great since you brought up points that I haven't thought of yet, especially the part about how being pale used to be a fashion statement! Good job :)

Krlosier

Re:
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 9:42 am

Thanks for this Rachel! It's a good reminder because I often spend too much time on my outward appearance rather than inner. I don't think it's wrong to want to look pretty and nice, but when I place that above my time with God or obsess over my outward appearance, it's wrong.
So thanks!
PS- haha just a side note...I love caramel frappes! Haha and I have two brothers who work at a Panera...and I'm joining them in 9 1/2 months! ;D

Traci

Re:
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 10:13 am

Wow, what a GREAT post - thanks so much for this reminder, Rachel!!!!!! Such a blessing!!!!!!!
Love in Jesus,
~Traci

Alyssa

Outward Beauty
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 10:52 am

Thanks Rachel! I really enjoyed reading the post, and it definitely helped me grow in the Lord! Sometimes I really need to think about this concept...

vic

Rachel Chick
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 11:39 am

First off- WONDERFUL POST! This applies so much to us. This is an area that I have been struggling with recently.Mom and I were just talking about how being tan is actually not that good for you.
Second- I am also from the great state Pennsylvania. That makes me already like you. ;-)
May God bless you,
Vic <3

Kaitlyn

Thank You!
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 12:33 pm

Thank you for this beautiful reminder! I struggle with my body image. I don't feel like I look beautiful and sometimes I worry what others think. I even wish I'm a lot thinner than I am. But it shouldn't matter. God made me the way I am because He thinks I'm beautiful. I needed to be reminded to focus on God, fall in love with Christ, and become more like Him. Inward beauty is a lot more important than outward beauty!

Thank you, Rachel, and God bless!

Rachel Chick

Thank you!
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 12:34 pm

This is so cool! :)

Thanks so much for posting this Erin + LYWB blog team!

I hope you girls enjoy it!
And if you do, feel free to check out some other stuff I've written on my own blog at:

http://beautifullyselfless.blogspot.com

Thanks again! :)

Megan

Thank you so much!
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Thanks Rachel for this great post!
I really agree on all that you said about girls trying to look like the world. Makeup lives up to it's name, it is truly just for girls who want to "make-up" how they want to look instead of enjoying the countenance that God really gave them.
Once again, I want to thank you for this post. It really encouraged me when I read it, and I am now going to press harder to love the Lord and to be like Him.
God bless!

-Serving Him

Becca

thank you!
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 3:51 pm

This post really touches on things I feel God is putting on my heart recently. He grabbed me closer than I have ever been to Him and have actually been talking with Him all day every day. It may seem weird, but since I have been closer to Him, I haven't really been worried about my body image or how I look. I think it is important for us as Christian girls to remember that this life is temporary.. and so are our looks! Also, that our life isn't about us once we have accepted God's truth; it is alllllll about Him. This post couldn't have come at a better time!
Thank you so much!
~Becca

Jazzy101girl

Re:
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 6:40 pm

Thanks for this post!!:)

I often struggle with self image ... And sometimes when I start to compare myself to other girls I feel like God is always telling me, "Charm is deceptive, beauty is vain but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised," and that always helps!

I'm also reminded that God cares more about who I am as a person and my relationship with Him then self-image:) And thanks again for the reminder!!':)

Blessings!!:)

Emma

Re:
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 8:39 pm

Thank you for writing this.It was really good!!!
I often struggle with outward bea uty and thinking I am not pretty enough.And so often I see someone who is so pretty and I envy and feel terrible about myself.Thanks again,I really needed this!

Heather (Svancara)

Re:
on Thursday, June 16, 2011 at 10:48 pm

Great post! This is something that every girl struggles with. It was hard for me in middle school having such beautiful girlfriends, and everyone saying how beautiful they are all the time. I tried to make myself beautiful in other way, by having the nicest clothes, by having the most friends, and then just acting plain snobby to make myself feel better. How much easier it would have been back then to just rest in God's Truth! God crafted me with His own hand; there's no way that I can be anything but gorgeous.

And btw, I love my lily white skin =) Who cares what Jersey Shore says?

Sophie

Thank you
on Friday, June 17, 2011 at 12:48 am

Thank you soo much.....God has really been speaking to me lots about inner beauty and modesty!...i have really struggled in those areas...He has really opened my eyes, i totally agree the wrong in todays fashion but its hard not to follow it !!........really thank him for bringing me on this site....it has helped me alot!! giving me alot of support!!!

thank you :)

anonymous

Re:
on Friday, June 17, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Hey, could you please write a post on eating disorders? I have just recently started to overcome anorexia nervosa, and was wondering if the Bible has anything to say about these illnesses.

Brandi

Hey Girl!
on Friday, June 17, 2011 at 11:28 pm

Great post Rachel! It is so encouraging to know there are young women out there who take a stand for God's truth! Keep it up!

Heidi

Re:
on Saturday, June 18, 2011 at 10:56 am

Thank you so much, Rachel, for writing this. You can never read too many things about how inner beauty is more important than outward beauty to help remind us all.

I love the part where you say, "However, being beautiful means nothing when a girl's heart is a dark shade of black and full of hate and bitterness." I totally agree! I have some friends who spend a lot of their time looking at pictures of models, and honestly, I can't stand to be around them when they are. I don't even think models are pretty anymore. If you look at their eyes, they are so lifeless and void. They don't have the joy that we have with Christ, they're just plain down sleezy. It really saddens me to see people so caught up in trying to look like them. (No offense if you are one of those people!!!!)

Jessie

Re:
on Saturday, June 18, 2011 at 11:35 am

Thanks for the post. i totally agree. i have been having problems with that lately. but then i ask myself who am i trying to be, my self or the girl on the front page of seventeen magazine(which i only see not trying to read)?

Autumn

SO TRUE
on Saturday, June 18, 2011 at 8:47 pm

This is so so so true. I get talked about a lot for being bigger than a size zero all the time. When years ago an opra was made and the man preferred only big ladies. So who knows I may be getting made fun of for my weight today and tomorrow I could be praised for it. God Bless :D

Cassie

thanks
on Saturday, June 18, 2011 at 8:51 pm

thanks for this post! I've really been struggling recently with wanting to be thinner than I am-- and I think a lot of girls struggle with that. I am terrified of gaining weight, and I've been counting calories for a long time, trying to lose weight even though I'm a healthy weight. Eating is stressful, and it seems like whenever I am trying to pray or read the Bible, Satan attacks me with thoughts like, "you ate too much last night." or "you should go weigh yourself again." I know that inner beauty is more important than outer beauty; I know that my relationship with God is way more important than being thin, and I know that being thin is way overrated today, but I can't get that knowledge to go to my heart! I've been really honest here, so please-- anyone have any advice for me??

Blessed by God

Loved this post!
on Sunday, June 19, 2011 at 4:01 pm

I have naturally tan skin because my mother is fair and my dad is dark-skinned. All of the people in my school look at me. I tried to ignore it, but it kept getting worse. Finally, I realized that this was a way to promote God in these people's lives, and I have tried really hard to do everything in His name and be just. A lot of the people at my school wear way too much make-up and jewelry, so I also try not to wear much except for modest clothes and a smile.

Gracer

@Erin
on Sunday, June 19, 2011 at 6:44 pm

How do I make Jesus my identity? What on earth did God make me for? (i know, i know - to glorify God, but my future seems so hopeless I don't expect much out of it). I know that I have heaven to look forward to... eventually. I know life is not, and isn't going to be, easy or fun. But Why did God let evil appear in the 1st place? What's the point? Sometimes I want to stop the world and get off. I know that my trials in life haven't been as bad as many, many other people's -- what gets them through life? What do they have to live for?

Rachel Britt

I love your post!
on Monday, June 20, 2011 at 2:35 pm

Thanks so much for posting this. I went through issues with self confidence and not thinking I was pretty enough or skinny enough since I was in middle school which were only resolved about a year ago. Now when I talk to girls that have gone through the same stuff I did I alway tell them that God made them and God doesn't make junk because thats what helped me.
It's really encouraging to know that other girls feel the same way as I do about changing trends and about beauty from the inside being the best beauty. When you're beautiful on the inside and you are in love with Jesus, it always shows on the outside.
Thank you very much.

Mackenzie

Awesome
on Monday, June 20, 2011 at 5:32 pm

Awesome post. Thank you, Erin!!! <3

Lorree, with the LYWB team

re: Gracer
on Tuesday, June 21, 2011 at 11:38 am

God loves you, Gracer! He has a plan for your life (Jer. 29:11). Right now you can only see a small portion of His plan but He knows the entire plan. He wants to use everything He allows into our lives for His glory. He wants to use them to draw us into a closer relationship with Him. That relationship is what gives us our identity. We are daughters of the King (Eph. 1:5). We are loved with an everlasting love – a love that knows no limits (Ps. 103:11). The most important thing you can do, Gracer, is to keep reading God’s Word. It is the key to being able to know His love and His plan for your life. It is the anchor for your soul (Heb. 6:19). We do have Heaven to look forward to, but we can also be assured of His presence with us while we are still on earth. He longs to walk each day with us, encouraging us and pouring out His grace on our lives to strengthen us in the midst of the trials (2 Cor. 12:9). He loves you more than you can imagine, Gracer!

Heather (Svan)

Re:
on Tuesday, June 21, 2011 at 12:56 pm

@Cassie: You should use God's word to combat thoughts like "I'm fat" and "I'm ugly"

So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27

You were made in God's image. You were crafted with His own hand. There's no way you can be anything but beautiful!

"The king is enthralled by your beauty" Psalm 45:11

There's no room for feeling ugly in this verse.

**I think you should read this post: http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=739

Search the word for God's take on your beauty, and when Satan attacks you, just recite these passages to yourself, and remember that you are beautiful<33

Anonymous

Re:
on Tuesday, June 21, 2011 at 6:01 pm

Thank you.

Julia

A Big Lie
on Tuesday, June 21, 2011 at 7:01 pm

WHAT!?! 'Inner beauty is important, but outer beauty is even MORE important"?!? EXCUSE ME?!?!
I don't watch TV, so I had no idea that there was a commercial like that out there! That's just plain horrible - and it's a direct contradiction to what God says! Oh, the poor, sweet girls who fall for such. an. ugly. lie. Outer beauty is NOT the most important. Who cares if a girl is magazine-cover beautiful if she is selfish, or mean, or nasty. Acting in an ugly way, in my mind, negates a lot of good looks.
Well, sorry for that rant. ;-) That just got on my nerves a little. (Well, maybe a lot.) Thanks for the awesome post!
And girls - I hope you know - INNER beauty is the most important! GOD in you, making your heart lovely, is the most important!

Alex

fat
on Tuesday, June 21, 2011 at 10:16 pm

sometimes I feel as if I weigh 200 pounds
I now that I'm much thiner than that but all my friends are like a size 0 and look great I just wish I could as thin as them
to get the guy I have a crush on sence
I was 4.

Vicky

Low Self-Esteem
on Wednesday, June 22, 2011 at 12:48 am

Is there any topics on low self esteem? I'm kind-of struggling with it :(

Heather (Svan)

Re:
on Thursday, June 23, 2011 at 12:25 am

@Vicky: Here's one: http://www.liesyoungwomenbelieve.com/index.php?id=737
It's from a few days ago. Hope that helps..

morgan

you're beautiful <3
on Thursday, June 23, 2011 at 4:02 pm

i reallly loove this subject. my girl's small group has been reading a book about accepting your true beauty and so far im pretty sure its changed alot of the girl's mind set on how they look. it doesnt matter how u look on the outside, it only matters how beautiful your heart is(: if you doubt how u look or say you're not pretty enough to hang out with the "popular people" then you're doubting the way God made you. think of it this way-if you were the one who spent so much time going through every tiny detail of every single thing on the face of the universe, and people started complaining that they're not good enough-don't you think that'd be insulting? God made everyone unique in their own special way and everyone is beautiful in God's eyes <3

Tiffanie

ME !
on Thursday, June 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm

As a young women I often found my self struggling with my self-esteem, and as a dancer I have to live in the image of what my body should be able to do and look like. I have never been called fat , well at least not to my face , yet i find myself think that I am . I know that it is a lie but its so hard not to let it controll me. I guess what I am asking for is prayer. A prayer to help me not to become the image that I see fit to want , but the image that God has birthed me to be. Thats all I ask .
Thank YOU
Tiffanie

Stephanie

@Alex
on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 2:14 am

hey alex
i couldn't hope but notice your comment. you would like to be a size 0! that's tiny! im sure u are a good size. PLEASE don't think that you are fat. :) and if you think being REALLY SKINNY is going to get some guy to notice you, what is he going to see beyond looks. will he just like you because you are skin and bones, or is he going to see the inner alex? it is just like in those movies where some girl has had a crush on a guy for ages so she gets all pretty for him to notice her but her true love is her best friend (who is a guy). i hope this helps you. i will pray for you
your sister in Christ,
Steph =)

Dania

Yaaay!
on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 2:13 pm

That is true I always had low selfesteem since I can remember! when I met Christ honestly, I would think of him all the time! I was totally in love with Jesus && I remember that my friends told me o you look so beautiful && I was full of compli
ments by the people. Even my mother td me you are really beautiful but now your inner beauty Stands out even more! && since then I realized that it's true God makes you even prettier than you are && younger without the need of products!

(:

Dania

Yaaay!
on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Sara

Encouragement
on Tuesday, June 28, 2011 at 1:59 pm

Thanks for the encouragement Rachel! I went through a faze where I didn't care about what other people thought of me, but lately I've been trying to impress some guys at my church. Your post has helped me realize that I have been doing this the wrong way! thanks you so very much, keep it up =D

Gracer

Re: Lorree
on Sunday, July 17, 2011 at 3:56 pm

Just want to say thank you for responding to my questions, I am still trying to take it to heart.
God bless

Talya

Re:
on Tuesday, July 19, 2011 at 8:45 am

This is my first time on this website and I mean i agree with everything that all of you have said, but the thing that I still don't get is, we say that outer beauty is NOT important.. but even STILL we worry about what people think about us? I know I'm most probably the biggest culprate, I won't even try to hide it.. but it's hard for me.. I'm just still not,, pretty,, enough i guess.?

Elida

xdIjenEJdxt
on Monday, July 25, 2011 at 11:30 am

Heck yeah this is exatlcy what I needed.

Kaylah

This post
on Wednesday, August 3, 2011 at 2:17 pm

I would really like to use this article for my ministry. It is perfect, who can I contact about using this for my e-newsletter?

Sarah, with the LYWB team

Kaylah...
on Wednesday, August 3, 2011 at 7:40 pm

We are so glad the post was especially meaningful to you! You can direct a comment to the writer of this post, Rachel, and if she happens to see it perhaps she can respond.

God bless you and your ministry!

Rachel Chick

@Kaylah
on Thursday, August 4, 2011 at 2:03 pm

Hi Kaylah! :)

Yes! You may use the article for your ministry... I feel so honored to have you sharing it with others! Thank you for asking. :)

And to the rest of you: I am so encouraged by all your comments! God is so good - I feel blessed that He should use me in this way! My heart really breaks for all those girls struggling, thinking they aren't beautiful - what a lie they are believing! Keep fighting the good fight ladies! You are loved! :)

And once again, if you did like my post, you can check out similar ones at my blog:
http://beautifullyselfless.blogspot.com

Thank you!
God bless!

Mother

Help regarding daughter (weight)
on Thursday, August 4, 2011 at 10:54 pm

My daughter loves & accepts herself as she is. She literally takes God's truth and lives by it ~ she is loved as she is! This is GREAT except she continues to gain weight and does not care! She is healthy (for now) and thinks she does not have a problem (260 lbs+++). We have seen doctors, nutritionists, etc... We have tried to help her but eventually she falls away from our help because it is too hard with so much food in the world. She has alot of friends/functions and there is constantly food everywhere! She is almost 18. We have a great relationship and I don't want to jepardize it. I have been angry & disappointed and she has seen me at those times. I have told her that she is responsible for her choices and I will leave her alone. I have given this situation to the Lord. What else can I do? I am waiting from the Lord to give me direction. What has helped for anyone in the same situation? Thank you in advance!

Lorree, with the LYWB team

re: Mother
on Wednesday, August 10, 2011 at 3:37 pm

What a heartbreaking situation you are in. God says he looks at the heart and not our appearance (1 Sam. 16:7). He tells us that our beauty lies in a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Pet. 3:4). He puts gluttony and drunkenness together demonstrating a lack of self-control (Prov. 23:20-21). And yet He tells us that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and exhorts us to glorify God in our body (1 Cor. 6:19-20). This creates quite a tension, doesn’t it!

You have done what you can, Friend! If you have told her you will leave her alone, then you must honor your word. You have said that you have given it to the Lord. What else can you do? Pray! That is the most powerful thing you can do for your daughter! Take her faithfully and boldly to the throne of our almighty God. Only God can change your daughter’s heart in this area. Entrust her into His hand to convict her of the sin in her life – the sin of gluttony. He loves her far more than you do (hard to imagine, I know!) and He knows what it will take in her life to get her to the point that she is willing to do what it takes to decide to make the dietary changes she needs to in her life. It may involve a health crisis. It could be cruel words or attitudes from others. While not condoning her behavior and choices, you can still love her and impact her life by praying for her! We often think that “all we can do” is pray when it is the most powerful and effective thing we can do for others (James 5:16).

Praying for you and your daughter, Friend!

Lorree

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